As Amanda's and my wedding day looms closer and closer, we're starting to feel the pressure. We've both had a couple of nightmares about things not being done. I still have sewing to do, some addresses to gather so we can finish sending out invitations, and quite a few things left to make. While we'd like to invite everyone we love and adore, because of lack of space to for people to stay and the fact that we are trying to pull this off on a sorely tiny budget (Amanda's income), we have to keep the guest list very small. However, a friend mentioned recording the event, so if that does happen, I will be able to share that video so people who can't attend can still see it.
Budget and keeping the guest list small aside, we've run into a few minor issues. The first being that we've had a hell of a time finding a cake topper. Being in same sex relationship, we wanted two female figures and we wanted it to be along the Gothic/Fantasy theme. We toyed with getting D&D figures to paint. We tossed around some idea for making them ourselves. And then we stumbled on "Sisters", a figure cast from the picture above, from Selena French. We both really like her art and while purple isn't one of our colors, it is pale enough and runs along our theme enough, that we decided this was our best option. We aren't sisters, obviously, but it doesn't matter. It is two females and we fell in love with it pretty instantly.
The second was figuring out a guest book. I wanted something unique that we could display. A vlogger I follow on Youtube used a globe of the world. I wanted something that would tie into out theme, and decided why not a skull. Amanda was keen on the idea and so we waited until the Halloween decor came out to begin our search. We found a black polyresin at Michaels and bought silver sharpies for people to sign it with.
I really wanted to make the invitations myself to keep costs down. But there I ran into another problem. Amanda and I couldn't agree on some mock ups I made on the computer. She wanted something 3-D. So we played with some ideas and finally agreed on one. Unfortunately I don't have one to show at the moment, they are all sealed up. However, I did hand deliver a couple to some very close friends so I will try to get a picture of one of theirs next time I am at their house. I, of course, sent one to my parents, mostly to see if my handmade black envelopes with silver shaprie lettering would go through the mail. It did, so that's a relief. I've finished making the invites today and am waiting on a couple addresses. As soon as we get more stamps, they will be in the mail.
We still have much to do, but things are beginning to come together, and while I am having kind of crap day, I'm being mildly productive, so that is something.
We still have much to do, but things are beginning to come together, and while I am having kind of crap day, I'm being mildly productive, so that is something.
My depression monster is being a rife bitch. I think it's mostly the pain talking today, but I'm also dealing with a lack of self esteem, and some guilt (Amanda says my guilt is as if I'm a Catholic school girl with a Jewish mother. Seriously, I apologize for nearly everything). I was outside earlier this morning, frustrated over physical pain, something I said last night, frustrated that I was frustrated, and half a dozen other things, when the thought "I must have been a real bastard" in a past life hit me. This is not an uncommon thought. Since I seem to keep having this though, I tried to turn it on itself and figure out what lessons I'm being taught by the situations I've had and issues I am facing/dealing with. Humility? I think I'm pretty humble all ready. I thought about a couple of other things that kind of took a negative turn, so I left it for another time. The point was to turn it into a positive.
I think I have mentioned that Amanda is doing a written role play with me. She's trying to get back into writing and I'm trying to keep writing. It has been a really long time since we have done one together and we missed it, I think. We are keeping it light, semi-fluffy, and keeping it 'no pressure'. We post when we can and want to post, which is really helpful. So far it's been pretty fun. My character is an epileptic, very particular, semi-ocd, introverted college senior and nerd. Her's is a dashing, young, college literary instructor with sad and wounded past. So far so good, we are both really enjoying where the story is going.
