Dispicable and senseless animal massacre

(photo from abc news)

I don't know how closely anyone pays attention to the news or has access to, but recently a man, who owned a wild animal preserve in Zanesville, Ohio, let his animals lose and then ended his own life.

I don't really care as to what led the man to let the animals free or why he killed himself. What bothers me is the measures authorities took to manage the situation. Supposedly they tried to tranquilize the animals and when that supposedly didn't work, they shot them to death. They shot 49 innocent animals who had done nothing wrong but had the audacity to have been set free, scared, and run.

Yes, I understand that these were wild animals. Yes, I understand that they could have hurt people. Yes, 49 animals are a lot to deal with, especially when the are lions, tigers, bears, ect... But I don't care. I do not think that the authorities handled the situation in the interest of the animals, I don't believe they even tried. I think they brutally murdered them. Not only did they murder them but they drug them behind a backhoe with chains to a mass grave. Talk about adding insult to injury. You'd think they would have the decency to at least treat them better in death than in life. Worse than that, some of those animals were the rare Bengal Tigers. WTF! Aren't those still on the endangered species list? Aren't we supposed to protect them? 

I've always said animals are far better than people. My best friend in the world is my cat, Yoda-chan. I would never allow someone to treat him as those animals were treated.  

An Exodus in the making...

It's official, my Gf and I are moving to Northern Idaho. So I'll be leaving the grass plains for the mountains and snow again. All we have to do is square a date. I'm much more relaxed about it than I was a few weeks ago. I think I have had some time to process it and while my family isn't too happy isn't too happy, I am looking on the positive side of things. I'm going to have to transfer from one ITT Campus to another but I've talked to the people in charge of that at school and it'll be relatively easy.

Speaking of school, I've got a test tonight and I am hoping that I built my circuits right for lab. I'm probably going to have to leave early. We've got a car issue and my lab partner seems to be having as much trouble with formulas as I am. But I've got a handle on the formulas for this chapter so I'm going to help him out. My problem is the conversion aspect. The math is fine but the labeling is giving me trouble.

Well, off to take a shower and get ready.  

Making horns with my hair! And other hair topics.

That's right, I've been twisting my hair up and making little horn buns on the top of my head, sadly, because I don't have a hair band, they aren't staying and now I've managed to give myself some tangles. And I thought since I've had some pretty heavy blogs, it was time to do a fun one, especially since I'm in a much better mood today.

I have what most people deem long hair. I think it's short but that is because I am use to having my hair so long I can sit on it much like my friend Katwarrior. But after awhile and lack of funds or people I trust with my hair, it gets split ends and doesn't look as nice. So I've kept it between shoulder length and as long as the middle of my back. I've also dyed it just about every color except orange and yellow. I don't like those colors, for some reason they make me jittery. Don't ask why, they just do.

Recently I've wanted to go back to dying my hair black because everyone thinks it looks better than my natural medium brown or even red (as I had it in high school). But since I am currently unemployed and going to be for the next couple of months due to college and moving out of state, I've really wanted to dye it black with blue streaks. Sadly, I won't be adding the blue. I don't have the money for it but if I did, I would use Special Effects Hair Dye. I've used Manic Panic before but Special Effects is the better of the two. You can get it from several places online but I get it from www.goodgoth.com .

Now if you have dark hair and need to bleach your hair or if your hair is really dry, I suggest using a hydrating conditioner. Herbal Essence's Hello Hydration is good and more within a budget. Because people, it does matter what shampoo and conditioner you use. I really can't stress that enough. So it is best to try those out that are within your budget and find what works best for your hair. I'm not going to tell you to go out and buy salon products or anything expensive, just find something within your price range that works. Also if you have dandruff, use a dandruff shampoo until the problem is under control and switch back to your regular shampoo. I do this on occasion because for some reason I have a dry scalp but oily hair and I'm not afraid to tell anyone that.

On to hair styling. For myself, I don't typically use any products in my hair. I don't like the flakiness gel gets after awhile or the straw feel of hair spray. I'm not even sure I like moose or hair glue. But I do have those fly away hairs and I have a patch of baby bangs that never grew out. I hide those with bangs. However, there are times when I want to curl my hair for a special occasion. My hair is almost a nightmare to curl. I'm not talking about the layers, no. My hair doesn't like to hold curl and often times if I curl one side, it's fallen by the time I've gotten the other side finished. So in cases where I want my hair to curl, I have to use product. Moose doesn't do the trick so I have to use hair spray. So, I find that spraying my hair a little when it's strait, just before I put the curling iron on it helps and then of course I have to spray it again after I set the curling iron aside.  I'm sure there are other ways to do it, but this is what works for me.

Make up! Oh boy do I love make up! I even love watching make up tutorials on youtube done my professional make up artists to amateurs. But what I hate more than anything is seeing someone talk about using these high priced make up brushes and products. I simply do not have the budget to go out and buy a load of make up brushes let alone a lot of the make up they advertise. So I usually end up using my fingers, those cheap little make up applicators you can get from wal-mart for eyeshadow, and believe it or not, paint brushes from craft stores that I've collected over the years. But I don't use the brushes all the time and only when doing costume make up at Halloween for friends.

The point is, you don't have to go out and buy expensive stuff to get the looks you want. I get a lot of my make up from The Icing or Clare's, but most often I buy it from Wal-mart or Walgreen's. There is an online store I've been ogling that has some really nice deals on eyeshadow palates, http://www.bhcosmetics.com/ . I have also bought eyeshadow and lip gloss from Good Goth.com but unfortunately they don't have near the selection they use to.

Also, if you are going to buy make up and make it last, make sure to keep it clean. This was one of the main principals I learned in a theatre make up panel at a Thespian convention I went to in High school. The same applies for everyday make up. Don't leave it open for dust and dirt in the air to get into it. You'll also want to replace it once it starts separating and certainly after no more than 3 years. I think you're supposed to replace it sooner than that, but if you take really good care of it, you can make it last longer. If you have brushes or applicators make sure to clean those as well. You don't want any nasty bacteria building up in them and certainly don't want it on your face much less the dust and dirt everything seems to collect.

Lastly, perfume. Ladies and gentlemen in your perfume or cologne. A lot of people have allergies or sensitive noses. My Dad and I can't walk through a department store near the perfume section without getting a headache and my Grandpa is allergic to a lot of perfumes. Vanilla is a big pet peeve of mine, a lot of people love it, I use to until a friend we use to carpool with started spraying herself all over with it. Mornings and afternoons were spent with the windows down when she was in the car. So down play the scents. You can still smell good without the over kill. Oil perfumes you especially have to be careful with. I love patchouli oil but I don't use much if it when I have it. It's fast to overwhelm. I also use a variety of body splashes from Bath and Body works (when they have a deal going on in the store). One sprit in front and one in back and I'm ready to go and no one's nose gets offended.

Well, that's all for today.  

Very frustrated

Yesterday I spent a little over 4 hours reading my DC Electronics textbook. Granted I had several breaks or rather interruptions here and there but in the end I read that chapter and studied it. Tonight, after returning home from my math class, I sat down to do the work for DC Electronics and found that I couldn't answer a single question. I don't know what formulas to use and am completely lost. It's not that I don't remember anything that I read, I do, but they don't spend time explaining how or why these things work. My GF offered that I should get a tutor at school. Well, that would be ideal and I would be willing to put in the time, the only problem with that is, I'm not sure where to look for one. The gals in the Learning Resource Center are only qualified to handle the basic stuff like math and composition, so where are the other tutors?

After explaining that, my GF asked about the teacher. Last class, my so called teacher made it clear to another student who asked about tutoring and if he could get help from him that the labs are open from a certain time to a certain time and that he was pretty much on his own. This instructor doesn't seem to even want to be there or really to teach or is just in this gig for the money.

All in all, at the end of the day, I haven't done my homework, my head is killing me, and I am generally disappointed in my education with ITT Tech thus far. You'd think paying 47 thousand dollars I could get some help with the things I am struggling with but I guess that is too much to ask for.

Out of control...

Things in my little corner of the world have grown very complicated and I am stuck feeling very much like a boiling pot of anger and high strung tension that is ready to burst, raining down vengeful wrath on all who are in my wake. No joke, I'm serious.

I've mostly come to terms with moving back to Idaho. It never takes me long to get settled with an idea or notion. I'm not saying that I am flaky, just that I adapt and adjust pretty darn well to new or altered situations. I still haven't told my Grandparents but I will eventually, when I am ready.


The weekend family problem with my cousin Amanda has gotten a little better and a little worse in some ways. For the better, my Cousin had to sign over temporary custody of her daughter to my Aunt. For the worse, She lied to the social work on so many levels. My uncle used to be a bouncer at a strip club and also at a bar and had a few battery charges against him that were dropped, but she used that against my Aunt and Uncle so now my Uncle can't live in his own damn house while her daughter is there. Also, my Aunt only has custody of the little girl until Cousin Amanda goes into some family treatment program that's supposed to help her get of drugs and alcohol.  Cousin Amanda give up pills and booze? Maybe long enough to get her daughter back but as soon as she has her and is off the radar, she'll go back to using. And she's supposed to get rid of Shelby, but we all know she hasn't because my Aunt heard him talking in the background of their phone call today.

There is more to this horrible situation, like the little girl being scared and afraid to let go of my Aunt or have my aunt out of her sight. There's that she's telling people that she hates her mom and she hates Shelby and that they both hurt her. All of it just makes me furious! Especially when I know she's going to be put back in that situation all over again.

Once again I find myself asking why all the bad people get everything they want while all the good people have to eat shit.

Now on to school. I've had my ups and downs with school, but that is to be expected. However, last night, I just about blew my top. I finally got to meet the instructor who is supposed to be teaching my DC Electronics class and he is a massive dick! Everything he said and did just rubbed me wrong, especially when he treated my lab partner and I like we were idiots. Worse, he was condescending and rude, impatient. And he talked about the class to his Senior students as if we were all a bunch of idiots right in front of us. I can honestly say that I will be extremely glad to be away from him when I transfer after I move. Oh and I met the new department chair for my department, he's kind of a jerk too.

And today hasn't been the easiest of days on the home front either. My back has been bothering me a lot. I can walk and move around but I can't stand as long as I have been able to and I have pain shooting down my leg. I really don't like taking my pain meds, but today I really had to. If that wasn't enough, I had the hiccups all day long! That was really annoying. Plus my Aunt came over and ranted at me and then my mom came down and told me what I was and wasn't going to do and for the rest of the day she bothered me every ten minutes. She needed this or that or wanted me to do this or do that. I lost my temper a few times.

All that aside, I got to sort of watch Ghost Hunters and Paranormal Witness on SyFy tonight. That was nice. I really find those shows interesting. Just for curiosities sake, I even went online to see if there were any paranormal groups up in Idaho. There are, not that I will be joining in anytime soon, but it's nice to know they are there if I ever want to check them out. 

My World: Yanked down a Sinkhole in one week.

The weeks started out pretty good, or so I thought, Monday morning at least. Monday afternoon my girlfriend told me that she wanted to move back to Northern Idaho. I had to pull the car over and park it before panic ensued. We had a plan: move in with my parents, save money, get into the town houses they live in or find a suitable two bedroom house or apartment. Guess that plan wasn't good enough anymore. I was in such a state of shock, and how it had been presented (nigh like an ultimatum) that I couldn't go to class that night.

Tuesday wasn't much better, in fact, panic hit me hard as I scrambled to find some sort of compromise. My girlfriend ditched worked and I ditched class so we could go somewhere and talk, as in talk without parents or family or friends bothering us. I presented her with "Let's stay until I graduate, that's a year and a half away and even on graduation night, we can move to Idaho then." Nope, she wasn't going for it. It had to be that we move in October or at the latest, sometime in December. I fought and pleaded with her, I even begged her but she won't budge. She misses her parents. I understand that and I sympathize, I've been in her shoes. In a perfect world, I would move with her the minute she wanted me to. But it's not a perfect world, my Grandparents are both 83 years old. Grandpa has Alzheimer's and I will lose precious time with him where he will remember me. Grandma needs help too. But that doesn't seem to faze my girlfriend.

Tuesday night we went to spend some time with my pseudo brother, Lucas and his girlfriend. After which we drive to the other side of town to spend time with another friend and ended up staying overnight. Wednesday afternoon, I went to my Dad's work, because I figured he couldn't kill me there, and told him the news. He was PISSED! The rest of Wednesday was spent with me in tears, dreading to go home, and finally hashing it out with my parents. In the end they weren't all that mad at me, they think this is a very stupid move, but they love me and will support me no matter what I decide to do. How the HELL do you choose someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, who you've been with for almost 4 years, and your family?

Thursday, spent all day sick with panic, again, and dread over telling my grandparents that I was moving. Told my cousin Sheena about the move and well, that pretty much crushed her. Did I mention that I've been crying myself to sleep every night?

Friday, I was starting to come to terms with the move, was a little more forgiving and less weepy and 'GRR' in how I dealt with people. That was until I got a call that I needed to take my Cousin Sheena to her brothers. Sheena wouldn't tell me anything until we were in the car and then we spent all of last night waiting to hear from the doctors and the police exactly what was going on.

The full story, my slut, p.o.s whore of a cousin Amanda Jean, dropped her kid off with her and Sheena's brother Tony. Now this kid adores Tony but something was wrong last night. She wouldn't go to him, was scared of him, and when Tony asked why, she said Shelby, that Amanda Jean's boyfriend, hurt her. When Tony asked where, she pointed to her diaper. So Tony called my Aunt Laura and they took the kid to the hospital to get looked at. That poor little girl, of only 3 years old, has been sexually molested. And on top of that, she'd been completely taken away and put in foster care for the time being.

Now no one can find or get in contact with her mother, Amanda Jean. The police are looking for her and her boyfriend, Shelby. And if that wasn't enough, apparently they stole Shelby's aunt's pain medicine shortly after she had surgery and her debit card. Also, they've been stealing other things and selling them at pawn shops. The last thing we heard of them was from Shelby's aunt this morning, apparently they showed up to the aunt's house and Shelby had a gun saying that he was going to blow his head off but as usual, Amanda Jean and Shelby escaped before the police could arrive.

So, we don't know where they are which is probably a good thing since most of us have murder in mind. Personally, I want to to torture the fuck out of Amanda Jean and Shelby and impale what's left of them out in some field for the crows to pick at. My aunt and uncle are going to try and get custody of the little girl and if they can't, I'm going to try. I love that little girl so much and I can't believe anyone would let something this horrible happen to her or any kid.

Happy Early Birthday to my Girlfriend!

And here is the near disaster of a birthday cake I made her. By disaster, I mean that I tried to make homemade icing and that was an epic fail, not that it didn't taste good but I didn't get all the confectioner's sugar mixed in. I had to use store-bought icing and add food coloring then make icing roses. I really need practice with that but for my first time, they didn't turn out too bad.

And of course I was under some pressure this afternoon when putting it all together, my mom wanted to help and while that's awesome, she was driving me nuts, people were coming, and I still didn't have everything ready for the party. So my coffin cake doesn't look quite like a coffin that has blood drizzled on it (melted red icing, not real blood mind you), and dirt (grated chocolate). And I don't have a real camera, just a crappy phone camera so the pictures don't come out as crisp as I would liked them to have.

But there you have it. It's been a long day and I didn't even make it to DAR this morning. Time for a movie and to relax.