Wackadoo

After stressing out, having OCD-like moments, and generally feeling the need to tear my hair out over my Math class- which was more write about how you feel and felt while me made you feel like a complete idiot while you try to decipher mathematical theories- I contacted my adviser Sunday night, and asked to be withdrawn from the class. I told her this class just wasn't a good fit, that it was more upsetting than revealing (other than grinding in the fact that I'm not a math person), and that I really wasn't getting anything out of the class but more stress than I really wanted to deal with at the moment. I asked if I could be switched to a regular math class, like algebra. Unfortunately, I can be placed in a regular math class at this time, but I was able to withdraw from the current class and got that all taken care of yesterday morning. I now have more time to focus and devote to my WW2 class, sewing, and other little projects I need/choose to do over the next few weeks.

Whoa, the library just got a sudden wave of noise and conversation. A few minutes it ago it was so quiet that I could hear a cranky man fussing about the cost of his print outs up at the front desk. I kind of wanted to throw something at him for giving the librarian trouble. But, sadly, that ship has passed.

Yesterday, since I was one class less, I decided to sort of celebrate. I finished the last book in the Elemental Witches series by Anya Bast, Witch Fury. I still don't like her writing style but I really liked her ideas and the main plot arch and I liked the last book much better than the first. After I was finished with it I read the short story she wrote that follows the series. It was my favorite, but then again Micah is probably my favorite character.

Tonight there is a class on developing psychic abilities with the IEPG (Inland Empire Pagan Guild). I was set to go but Skoora asked if I would skip it since she is leaving for Boston tomorrow and will be gone for two weeks. She's on a low residency MFA program and twice a year she has to go to the college to do said residency. I always hate it when she leaves for two weeks, but I always manage to keep myself occupied and fall into an alternate rhythm. Who knows, maybe this time I will manage to actually get some stuff done. Since I have some extra time, I kind of want to plow into a some writing. Here it is the 8th of the month and I haven't written a damned thing for Camp NaNoWriMo and I decided to participate again.

Feeling kind of Wackadoo today. I came into the library to pick up a book and decided to sit down and write a blog before going home to deal with homework. I had other stuff I wanted to blog about but I can't seem to remember what it was. At this point, it probably wasn't too important... And I just remembered that I forgot to take my allergy meds before leaving the house and that is why I've been sitting here with itchy eyes and skin. Time to go home!

Out of control...

Things in my little corner of the world have grown very complicated and I am stuck feeling very much like a boiling pot of anger and high strung tension that is ready to burst, raining down vengeful wrath on all who are in my wake. No joke, I'm serious.

I've mostly come to terms with moving back to Idaho. It never takes me long to get settled with an idea or notion. I'm not saying that I am flaky, just that I adapt and adjust pretty darn well to new or altered situations. I still haven't told my Grandparents but I will eventually, when I am ready.


The weekend family problem with my cousin Amanda has gotten a little better and a little worse in some ways. For the better, my Cousin had to sign over temporary custody of her daughter to my Aunt. For the worse, She lied to the social work on so many levels. My uncle used to be a bouncer at a strip club and also at a bar and had a few battery charges against him that were dropped, but she used that against my Aunt and Uncle so now my Uncle can't live in his own damn house while her daughter is there. Also, my Aunt only has custody of the little girl until Cousin Amanda goes into some family treatment program that's supposed to help her get of drugs and alcohol.  Cousin Amanda give up pills and booze? Maybe long enough to get her daughter back but as soon as she has her and is off the radar, she'll go back to using. And she's supposed to get rid of Shelby, but we all know she hasn't because my Aunt heard him talking in the background of their phone call today.

There is more to this horrible situation, like the little girl being scared and afraid to let go of my Aunt or have my aunt out of her sight. There's that she's telling people that she hates her mom and she hates Shelby and that they both hurt her. All of it just makes me furious! Especially when I know she's going to be put back in that situation all over again.

Once again I find myself asking why all the bad people get everything they want while all the good people have to eat shit.

Now on to school. I've had my ups and downs with school, but that is to be expected. However, last night, I just about blew my top. I finally got to meet the instructor who is supposed to be teaching my DC Electronics class and he is a massive dick! Everything he said and did just rubbed me wrong, especially when he treated my lab partner and I like we were idiots. Worse, he was condescending and rude, impatient. And he talked about the class to his Senior students as if we were all a bunch of idiots right in front of us. I can honestly say that I will be extremely glad to be away from him when I transfer after I move. Oh and I met the new department chair for my department, he's kind of a jerk too.

And today hasn't been the easiest of days on the home front either. My back has been bothering me a lot. I can walk and move around but I can't stand as long as I have been able to and I have pain shooting down my leg. I really don't like taking my pain meds, but today I really had to. If that wasn't enough, I had the hiccups all day long! That was really annoying. Plus my Aunt came over and ranted at me and then my mom came down and told me what I was and wasn't going to do and for the rest of the day she bothered me every ten minutes. She needed this or that or wanted me to do this or do that. I lost my temper a few times.

All that aside, I got to sort of watch Ghost Hunters and Paranormal Witness on SyFy tonight. That was nice. I really find those shows interesting. Just for curiosities sake, I even went online to see if there were any paranormal groups up in Idaho. There are, not that I will be joining in anytime soon, but it's nice to know they are there if I ever want to check them out.