Background nostalgia, angry sass, and what the fuck was that?!

Lately, as in within the last week or so, Amanda and I have begun our mornings with coffee and watching NHK World. Generally we get half an hour of news and then half an hour of whatever program comes on before or after it- just kind of depends on when we turn on the TV. Then she heads off to work and I leave the channel on in the background while I either take a nap or begin puttering about the house doing whatever it is I need to do. Sometimes I just sit and watch it for a little bit. But I was trying to figure out why I like having it on so much, I mean other than the channel having news I can actually stand and some interesting programs about Japan and Japanese culture. While I was in the bathroom today, I could hear it and realized after I had an odd memory tug, that it is nostalgia. It is summer, the air conditioner is making the house pleasantly cold, and the sound of a news caster filling the house reminds me of summers growing up. My Mom used to watch the news at noon before her soap operas came on for the afternoon. Our house nearly always felt cold and it was nice because I could curl up with a blanket and pillow and just be. So, in this sense, I suppose its a comfort.

This weekend I let some of my normally restrained sass out. I was saying all manner of things. It happens when I get pissed. Aside from hurting my knee, my heel cracked, and the damned neighbor kids were driving me nuts. Now, instead of just ripping up the grass and throwing it and twigs at my patio door, they are banging on the glass. All day the other day they were doing it no matter how many times I asked them to stop. I told them they could look at the kitties but they had to stay off the patio. I was ignored. After about three times of asking them to go away, I snapped at them. It didn't help. The lady who watches them wasn't doing anything and at the advice of Chris, I will be filing a formal complaint. My agitation continued througout the day and into the next. I also had some weird ass dreams that unsettled me and I don't remember why. I know that the Queen of England and Benedict Cumberbatch was in one dream and there was something to do with WW2, and a table in a room with markers and construction paper. I am still bothered by it. 

Yesterday was better. Amanda and I had a bit of a lazy day. She did some laundry and made us breakfast and we both made dinner. I made some no bake cookies with sunflower butter and we watched a comedian on Netflix. I started an anime but ended up turning it off to go to bed early. By that, I mean I laid on the bed and played with Thorin for a little bit. That's where I got myself into some trouble. Amanda came in and wanted me to move so we could put the clean sheets on. I had been laying on my stomach and as I rolled, sat up and started to slide off the bed (our bed is up high) I had one of the most horrible pains throughout my middle that I have ever felt. I can't even really describe it except that it was so bad I wanted to vomit and got that cold clammy pass out feeling. It subsided a little after a few minutes, but I was so sore after that I could't get comfortable in bed. I ended up sleeping on the sofa, which sucked. I still don't know what the hell happened. I feel better today. My friend Chris thinks I pulled some muscles. Could be. 

The good news for today is that I did my hair and make up today. I haven't felt up to doing either in awhile. I also signed up for Fat Girl Yoga, the first class is free. I figure that will give me enough of an idea of whether or not I can do it to see if I want to continue on and register for more classes. I also figure it will give me an idea of how best to position myself so I don't hurt myself. Other than that, my friend Chris is coming over for dinner tonight and we may or may not paint. 

You did what to Cookie Monster?

When I was a kid I was lucky enough to have a little cable in the house, mainly because it was part of the deal in the apartment complex my parents live in. But I didn't just grow up watching Nickelodeon and Disney, in my early days I watched stuff on PBS. I saw all sorts of thing most people won't remember Zoobalee Zoo for instance. But like most kids I also watched Sesame Street. My parents or someone even bought me Sesame Street Christmas tree ornaments, I was too little to remember who. Still I had them and still have a few back at my parent's house.

In the last few years I've been noticing a real crack down on fat people (I've only really started to take interest in the news and politics and whatnot in the last five, forgive me for being more concerned with working, writing, college, and getting out on my own prior). Let's face it, that's what it is. Fat people aren't pretty to society's eyes and so society must do something about it. Never mind that all the healthy food is more expensive than the processed crap they shovel out onto the shelves. Don't get me wrong, I love Cheesy Tuna Helper and Beef Stroganoff Hamburger Helper, Ravioli in a can, Ramen, all that kind of stuff. It's relatively quick and easy to make and when I was working, going to school, and trying to have a social life, that's what I turned to when making fast dinners at my house.

Now that I've gotten away from my OCD Mother, I love her but she and I can't be in the same kitchen at one time because it's her way or else, I have experimented with other food and learned how to make more things from scratch and so on, and have really pushed for better food. Not trying to toot my own horn but I'm really not that bad of a cook. People have asked why I don't go to culinary school and do it professionally, I tell them that I don't like to be rushed in a kitchen and if I made a career then I wouldn't love  it anymore. The kitchen is mine when I am in and God help those who dare to enter without my expressed permission! Aside from that we don't buy processed food that much if at all. We buy more produce and fruit and meat. It's hard all of that stuff is expensive. I personally don't buy into the 'Organic' fad because it's the same thing and if people really wanted to get as Organic as they can then they should grow it all themselves.

Anyway, I've always said if Society/ Government/ Whoever, really wanted to help the 'Obesity Epidemic' they would make the unhealthy stuff more expensive than the healthy stuff or at least make the healthy stuff more affordable. But they won't because the Powers that Be want as many people dependent on the Government so the Government has more control of our every day lives, the more control they have the more they can do whatever they want and the less power we have to stop them. Yeah, I just said that, bite me, it's the truth.

Here's where the Government and the Powers that Be are already encroaching on our lives. They have decided that parents aren't responsible enough to buy and prepare food that is healthy enough for their children. I'm sorry but when you are living paycheck to paycheck and the "Government" decides that you make too much to get food stamps but all your money is going to bills and medical bills, you buy what you can for food and pray that it lasts. May parents would often make a big pot of Stew, Chili, or Bean Goo (it's what we called re-fried beans with salsa and hamburger mixed together for burritos) and eat it over the week. Dad would get sandwich meat and bread so we had sandwiches for lunch and cereal for breakfast. We made it just fine with what we had and besides, I didn't actually start getting fat until I went to college and ate the food the damned college served in the cafeteria, unhealthy processed foods, mother fuckers! All those carbs went straight to my ass!

Back to the point, Whomever is in charge has decided that parents aren't responsible enough to teach their kids healthy eating habits and has decided they are going to 'help educate' the poor impressionable children for them. One of the ways they are doing that is by fucking with one of the characters I loved watching as a child. I just want to point out that I am not a fan of cookies or brownies really. I like cake and pie but I'm still not a person who craves a lot of sweets. Cookie Monster is no longer the Cookie Monster, he's been ruined, in my opinion. Cookie's are a sometimes snack now. What the Fuck?! Leave shit alone, please, really.

I will allow that there are some parents who don't give a rats ass about their kids. That they park them in front of the TV to do whatever it is that floats their boat and should take responsibility of their kids, they made them after all damn it. But a lot of other parents are like my parents, they did everything they could to make sure I had food, clothes, shelter, and they actually did stuff with me like read to me, played games, watched a movie, ect... Hell, we even went to Grandma's and worked in the garden together.

The point is, stop trying to preach your ideals at people. Most are doing what they can and trying to provide the best they can. And stop ruining things I love with your political aims. If I want to feed my kids cookies and they want cookies then by god they shall have cookies!