10 minutes in the sun, camping, cats

My cats are all over me today. In fact, Thorin has been following me all through the house, he's been very vocal, and Narcisa has be super cuddly. They missed us. We were only gone two days and one night. I don't know what they will do when Amanda and I go on our honeymoon after we get married. 

We went camping this weekend. There wasn't a need for us to rush this time and we took it easy getting to our friend's house out in the country where we were camping. Because we were the only couple staying with a tent, we decided to camp inside for the night. That made Amanda happy, she didn't have to pitch the tent. We had dinner, drank, and played Cards Against Humanity. We also spent some time just talking before bed. That was Saturday. Yesterday, we had breakfast and eventually made it outside to make altar cloths with sun developing dye. After that we me our friend's Grandma before doing a small ritual for midsummer before dinner. It was getting a little late, so we headed home. It was a nice relaxing and easy going weekend. 

I'm losing my vampire tan. In the ten minutes I was in direct sunlight yesterday, I got a little sunburn. It isn't bad, but it is a enough that  my face and chest are hot and sore today. I don't seem to have broken out in hives this time, but I am itchy. I'm hoping that my allergy medication is helping with the brunt of that. Amanda was in direct sunlight a good deal longer and was very red last night. She even had some bumps. 

I am taking it easy for the rest of the day because tomorrow I am helping my friend Rachel with her Kettle Corn stand at a farmer's market. She bought my parent's plane tickets so they could come to my wedding and I'm paying her back by working for her once a week. I'm still in shock that she would do that for me. I'm so grateful and when she did, I just wanted to cry. I am also very nervous about helping her. I'm not quite walking for five minutes a day (without a grocery cart in front of me to lean on) but I do get to sit down. There's also a good deal of nervousness because while I know I will work my ass off for her (the market she's at on Tuesdays is very busy) I don't want to let her down or mess something up for her. But, at the same time, like one of my other friends said, it will be good for me. I might get a little of my confidence back. 

Last weekend's camping, playing chauffeur, Das Stein Haus, shopping, and lunch

Amanda found a cell phone camera lens kit in the check out isle in Wal-mart last night. Fun fact, don't leave the flash on when using them. By the way, that's Narcisa checking out the pickle in my cup.

Okay so last weekend we went camping out at a friend's house. It was a small, invite only gathering and the drive was beautiful. Of course it was a chilly, cloudy, and wet sort of day so of course I loved it. Everyone set up their tents in the rain because if we hadn't, it as decided that it would rain all day and then we would have been trying to set them up in the dark. Of course once all the tents were set up, it stopped raining. 

While we were there we had a Fairies vs. Goblins of theme. Everyone had a grab bag and depending on what was in it a wand or a glass ball, was what you were. The wands were fairies and the balls were goblins. I happened to pick up the bag with the blue ball in it thus I was the King- or because I am a girl- Queen of the Goblins. One of my friend's children was Queen of the Fairies. Everyone else was either fairy or goblin and we played games and did actives outside, tallying up which side was winning. At the end, the Fairy Queen and I had a battle/ sword fight with swimming pool noodles. We ended up calling a truce partly because some meddlesome boys kept trying to get in on it, and also because neither of us were giving up. Honestly, my back was giving me all sorts of grief but there was no way I was letting that little fairy Queen beat me! So for at least a year, the Goblins and Fairies have peace. 

Aside from Goblin and Fairy wars, there was drinking, good food, and we watched Practical Magic outside under the stars, drinking margaritas. Some of the other campers were in inflated swimming pools with pillows and blankets. I had to go to bed early that night because I was in a lot of pain. I also had reading done, which was helpful. All in all, it was a lot of fun and if we hadn't had to worry about Amanda getting to work on Sunday, we would have stayed longer. 

Monday, I took some friends to a doctor's appointment because they are currently car-less, after a fashion. I hung out at their place for as long as I could before I had to head back and get read for Monday night's event.

I headed over to the north side around the 5 mile area of town to go to Joann's crafts and fabric store for a bit. I saw plenty of things I wanted but I didn't buy anything. We still had grocery shopping and bills to pay, and honestly, I was too hot and achy from the weekend to really care too much. I did look at yarn and knitting needles.

Afterward I met Amanda and one of our friends at Das Stein Haus, a German bar and restaurant. 

Our friend ordered her own beer plank and Amanda and I split one. We couldn't decide which one we wanted to try. So why not try several? We also had an appetizer of Kazen Spaetzle, delicious!

These were our choices.

Here is Amanda's dinner a Schnizel dish

And here is mine. I can't remember what it was called but what I can tell you is that I was very bad and ordered pork. It had a yummy pork sauce, mushrooms, and it was atop a bed of Spaetzel. It was fantastic! 

To finish it all up Amanda and our friend had apple strudel and I had one of my favorite kinds of cake in the world, Black Forest!

Which brings us to yesterday. I had some grocery shopping to do and while I wanted to go to the Kiev Market and one of the Asian markets in my area, I didn't quite make it. I did, however, begin at Yoke's Fresh Market. I was looking for something in particular and couldn't find it but picked up some produce. Next I went to Winco and did the bulk of my shopping there. I was hurting, hot, and tired, by the time I finished there and knew my spoons were almost spent. I stopped by another grocery store and while they didn't have exactly what I was looking for at Yoke's, they had a decent substitute. Bonus, they had a nice deal on tea so I got a couple of boxes.

When I got home, I only brought in the groceries that had to come in and left the rest in the car. But I was too tired, hot, and in too much pain to do the usual meal prep. I spent some time on the phone with my Mom, went to the bathroom, and then picked up Amanda and then went to Wal-Mart to finish up shopping. I'd forgotten mayonnaise, needed pads, and shampoo. We grabbed food at Taco Bell, came home, watched a weird anime episode, and went to bed. 

And that brings us to today. I slept in by accident and just up in time to meet a friend and take lunch to Amanda at work. We stayed there a little longer than we intended but Amanda is working late tonight. I know that parking is difficult downtown, especially during lunch, and especially since there is construction, but as helpful as my friend wants to be with helping me lose weight along with helping herself toward that goal, parking two and half blocks from Amanda's work really doesn't help when my back keeps trying to lock up. I had to stop a couple of times to kind of slowly coax it into cooperating with me. Which of course made me feel even worse because my friend had to slow down to begin with and then stop in the heat while I shifted around until I could walk more. I know she doesn't mind, I know she will wait for me, but I still feel bad about it. 

Last bit of news, we might go look at and test drive a car tomorrow afternoon, after Amanda's doctor's appointment.   

Lots of things, getting caught up, and something new

So much has happened since I last posted, tests, medical stuff, a camping trip, and I'm not sure where to begin. 

School, that's a good start. I finished lat term with a high B in both classes. Yay! Not A's but considering some of the crap I was dealing with, I am just so happy that I almost had A's. This new term seems like its going to be a good one. I've already had a week of it and really like both instructors.

Yoda is sick. He is bloated and at first we thought he was constipated. We took him to the vet but the vet said he wasn't and looked him over for a few more minutes. Basically if the bloating doesn't go down in the next week or so, we have to run some blood tests on him and see if he's having kidney or liver failure. So far he's been eating, drinking, and going to the bathroom the same, but he is sure sleeping a lot. I think he looks sad or uncomfortable and I am really worried about him, especially since he's losing more teeth. Yes, he is an old kitty. I have head him for 16-17 years and I love him dearly, but if he is suffering, I've made my peace with myself for when he needs to go. Jeeze, just thinking about it makes me cry. 

The weather has been nice. We went to the IEPG Frolicking with the Faeries pagan camp out last weekend. It was really great! I had a lot of fun and it was a nice way to end my first school term. I'll write more on that over in my pagan blog (which I have sorely neglected).

If anyone remembers, Skoora and I applied for a driving job. We thought it was going to be perfect! I wouldn't have to lift anything or stand for long hours, just drive. We told the people in charge of training and hiring that we could only work two days a week. We told them that several times and they seemed okay with it. They even scheduled us for more training and told us to expect a call in two weeks for when and where. That call never came. In fact we had to call them on said training day then wait two hours for a call back. The woman Skoora talked to, was huffy and said that we weren't a good fit because we could only work two days a week instead of full time 5-6 days a week. Um, no we didn't and she knows we didn't. And if they are hurting SO terribly for drivers as they say they are, they would have never gone through all the process of training and background checks and so forth. They just wasted company money and our time, not to mention our gas for when we had to drive into Spokane. Did I mention how utterly disorganized these people are and that I am going to have to get my bank account number changed because of it? One of the women who was training me, still had a voided personal check of mine I used to set up direct deposit. She never gave it to her boss.

Skoora actually thinks what really happened was that they decided they didn't want two lesbians working for them. She mentioned once in her interview when talking about me, that I was her girlfriend. I made the mistake in one of my training sessions, while trying to fill out paperwork for taxes of asking what I should put down because Skoora claimed me last year as a dependent. Yeah... But in the end, after most of our friends telling us they had bad feelings about this job, we simply told them, to forget it. I think I will be writing the company to tell them at least about the utter disorganization of their management here, what happened, how they handled things and so forth.  

I got a call Sunday or maybe it was Monday, I don't remember which, from my Mom. My Grandma had passed out and was in the hospital again. Of course no one has been very clear about the matter, only that Grandma is going to get something checked with her heart. My parents stayed over at my Grandparent's house with my Grandpa. Apparently Grandpa told my Mom that I am his favorite Grandkid (I'm the only one they had a great deal of contact with. I was at their house as much as I was at my own growing up) and wanted to know if he ad Grandma gave me the money to come home, if I would. Of course, I will come home. Skoora and I have made the plans and we are working on paying off debt and saving up enough to live on while she looks for work after we get there. It is just going to take us a little while. 

As for myself, health wise, I had to have an internal sonogram, which was really uncomfortable. The results showed nothing out of the ordinary. I look healthy. So my doctor's solution to the whole excessive bleeding- never ending period (which I'm back on again now that the birth control has faded from my system) is to continue to lose weight and take more birth control. REALLY?! Are you fucking kidding me?! My mother, who has always been thin, had this problem. My cousin, who is thin, had this problem, weight really isn't an issue at this point! Ugh! I'm so pissed about it that I asked my Dad if I started a go fund me page and essentially begged people for money for a hysterectomy (assuming I ever got enough) if I could just take it to a surgeon and ask them to do it. People get body modifications and sex changes, why can't I ask to have my internal girly bits removed?  Dad didn't know if that would work. 

So, since Skoora and I are trying to pay things off and save money, I have decided to stop taking my pain meds and all birth control. If I bleed all the time, fine. I don't want to pay over $20 a month for a migraine and nausea. My pain tolerance is higher now that I can manage the herniated disk pain with Advil or Ibuprofen (until I throw my back out that is). I know it's stupid but that give us $40 extra a month to put toward bills.

I have also decided that I am not actually ready to return to the work force. Not quite physically, and certainly not mentally. The last two-three years really hurt me emotionally and mentally. It was much worse than I ever let on and I am still trying to come out of that. It really shows when we are out in public, at least for me, because I am constantly trying to stave off panic attacks. So, my semi-solution to that is to put my sewing skills to use. Skoora is completely supportive and behind this, she's excited and even throwing out ideas for me. I am thinking about opening an Etsy shop wherein I'll sell tote bags, aprons, and whatever else I decide to make. I can embroider things as well, by hand of course. Eventually I would like to add things like jewelry, candles, soaps, and essential oils. 

I've really thought about this endeavor for awhile and it's a big risk. Fabric isn't cheap and there is a chance that I may not sell anything or much of anything at the beginning. In which case, friends and family will benefit at Christmas. But it is something and I will even look into doing craft fairs and such. I also have a lot of research ahead of me in looking for fabric on deals, getting started, getting stock made, ect...

It;s such a nice day out today. I would go out but I am really tired and needed to get some things indoors done. I opened the bedroom window and took a nice nap with Yoda today after I made Skoora's parent's anniversary cake. It is a kind of lopsided three tiered mint chocolate cake with dark chocolate icing. I'm going to go make dinner shortly. They wanted chicken and mashed potatoes. I wanted to do something more extravagant, but comfort food it is. 

I don't have many plans for this evening, just going to play it by ear. I do want to at least get a couple of my pagan blog posts written even post date them if I have too. And I want to plot out one of my stories so I can start writing it next month for Camp Nanowrimo!

   

Good Cat/Bad Cat, A few hours of free time, getting ready for the weekend!

This morning I've been up a little earlier than usual. I've watched a movie, eaten breakfast, and fed the cats. Yoda has had his insulin shot, I've looked at the usual morning internet stuff, and I've looked at the lists for the camping trip this weekend. Skoora was a tiny bit industrious this morning as well. She read me a little bit of her Creative Thesis to get my opinion on a section, she took a shower, and headed off to work. 

The last couple of days I've had mild panic attacks first thing in the morning. I wish I could say that wasn't a normal occurrence, but it hadn't happened for awhile. This morning was blessedly different. I awoke in a good mood despite the usual morning back and body pain and aches. It has to be the excitement of finishing up all of the homework for this term and the camping trip this weekend. Actually, I'm not totally finished with this term, I have to answer questions anyone asks me about my humanities paper. I've already checked to see if anyone has posted any and no one has as of yet. But, knowing most of the posting patterns of a good majority of my classmates, they probably won't get around to it until Sunday. Which is fine, I will be home on Sunday and will have ample time to respond if anyone asks me anything. 

Yoda has been very bloated and we think backed up. So we've fed him pumpkin to help him out. He seems to like it well enough. Sadly, he decided to leave me a present under my desk. I was on the phone with my Dad at the time and didn't know whether to scold him or congratulate him. So I said, "Bad cat, good cat"! My Dad laughed. 

While waiting for my friend from Kellogg to arrive, I find myself with an hour or so of free time. There are so many things I would love to do. From watching movies, an anime, reading all the books I haven't gotten to and have had to set aside for text books, to even writing. Gods, even drawing. I've wanted to find a stock photo of a pose I like and buy it so I could use it as the form for a painting I want to do. I have three blank, new canvases just sitting in my room begging for paint. But instead, I find myself tailoring a Pandora station to play mostly H.I.M. and blog writing.

Before Skoora and I started dating almost seven years ago, she introduced me to H.I.M. Right after I'd stumbled on a Gothic/darkwave/new wave/industrial internet radio station (R1 Das Darkwave- which is no longer in existence much to my dismay-). We both love a variety of music and had been suggesting bands to each other. I was in love from the very first song I heard. Ville Valo's voice is wonderful and I really enjoy the music he and his band put out. Sadly, I haven't been able to buy all the albums, that is a work in progress. Until then, and especially this now afternoon, I've happily cranked up the volume, and realized just how much I've missed all the days like this. Where I or we could just turn up the music, let it fill the room, and really enjoy it. 

Well, I hope everyone has a great day and a fantastic Litha- if you celebrate it- weekend. I am going to work on some more blogs whilst I wait for my friend to arrive and rock out to my music. I plan to take the camera this weekend so I might have some pictures to share later. 

Putting off homework one more night.

I was supposed to have picked up a friend today. She was going to come and visit for a few days. However we are so utterly broke at the moment that we couldn't drive to Spokane to get her. I felt bad but on some level not so bad. She didn't offer to help pay for gas and hasn't for the last several times we've picked her up on the way to some event. She also invited herself to come and stay. Usually I don't mind. I am pretty relaxed about people coming to stay and I try not to have them pay for gas or food (as they are guests), but we are hurting so bad financially, we just can't drive people around all the time, especially when they don't live in town. And we really don't have a lot of food.

This situation would have been much different had Skoora not had such an awful paycheck and nearly all of our bills come due.

Thankfully, as far as I know. This friend didn't seem upset when I told her. But then again, I don't know her very well and she is extremely difficult to read. Another friend of mine, who has met her, said she was creepy. Well, I don't find her creepy. I would like to get to know her better.

Skoora and I, a friend from Kellogg, and this new friend are all going to the Litha camp out with the Inland Empire Pagan Guild this weekend. We all decided since we are riding in the same car and will set up our tents together, that we would all pitch in for food for the weekend and share. I thought that was the plan anyway. Until this new friend made a strange comment. She said "I'll get this stuff on my costco card and you can pay me back". I was dealing with half a dozen other things and I was sick, so it kind of threw me, so I didn't clarify what the hell was going on. So now we have an issue that needs to be dealt with. I am really unsure how to handle it because she is so damned hard to read.

She was the one who wanted to split the food up between all of us (as in we each buy or bring a little food) and share. Generally that means that no one has to pay anyone else back. So, I have spoken to my friend from Kellogg and she said that she would not only pitch in for gas but she would help us pay this other girl back if she needed to. Honestly, this other girl isn't getting anything too expensive or that much so I don't know what her problem is. I know she's not going to pay for gas. I also think it's really unfair that my friend from Kellogg should have to pitch in more. With that said, when I get my first pay check from this new job, I will be paying my friend from Kellogg back whatever she pitches in.

I think I have also decided that if we do have to pay this new friend back for food. I may have to have a talk with her about our friendship. I would like to be friends with her, to get to know her, but I will not be taken advantage of. Especially when Skoora and I are trying to dig ourselves out of a hole and get back on our feet. I really don't want to have such a talk with anyone. It is uncomfortable and I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. But, like I said, I'm not going to let someone walk all over me or Skoora. 

I was going to be so industrious blog-wise yesterday, I get the house to myself ,there's yelling, and I want my coloring books and colored pencils

My house is filled with yelling at the moment. Skoora just got paid last night and most of it went to bills. We have to go donate plasma next week. We have enough to put a little gas in one of our cars, which is fine, but she didn't have enough time to go do that before work. So she asked her Dad to take her. And on come the 20 questions of Why? Meanwhile Skoora is pleading with him to just take her or she'll be late- because he drives like an old man. No really, he does. He sometimes stops at green lights and tries to go on red. Once he pulled off our street onto another and there was a car coming, we told him to hurry up but he slowed down to stop. He's 70 and I think he's trying to be overly safe sometimes. And if we drive, he bitches! I actually stopped my jeep one day, unlocked the doors, and told him to get out. LOL, he just laughed.

Yesterday I was going to be so industrious as far as blogs were concerned. Plans were made, topics chosen for my participation in the Pagan Blog Project (for my pagan blog), and I even thought about working on craft blog post (not that I have many of the crafts finished- leave it to me to choose to do big crafts instead of smaller ones). But, homework took the better part of the day and I stopped for an hour or so to have eat lunch with Skoora's parents. I even watched a TV show with Skoora's Mom and oh boy that was awful! Then show was, not watching it with her. I'll may talk about it another post or I might not, depends on how much gets done.

I did, however, get the bedroom mostly picked up, vacuumed (not supposed to vacuum, and did some laundry. I hurt my back, because why should my body let me have one day where I can do any house cleaning and feel good about it. This sort of thing is beyond being old. But I also have to remember not to push it with house work and the workouts at the Kroc. (I also got half of my homework finished.)

Oh, I don't remember if I talked about that yet. I started their active trax program and got to speak with a physical trainer who is good with back injuries. She is so nice and sweet. We basically had a consultation, we talked about my goals- which are to strengthen my body enough for me to get a regular job again, and lose weight- and then she showed me which of the weight machines to use, the elliptical, and said to keep coming to swim 2-3 times a week. I felt so bad because I kind of became a chatter box. I apologized, of course. I either clam up around new people or turn into a bit of a chatterbox, even in e-mails.

I get the house to myself for a few hours this afternoon. Skoora is at work now and her parents are going out to run some errands. I can have my music as loud as I want. I could even hook my laptop up to the TV and turn on Pandora for a bit. I probably wont. I still have my Humanities homework to do and just realized that I forgot to do my initial discussion post yesterday. Shit! I can't believe I forgot about that. Grrrr... Well, I know how it happened, got my days mixed up, thought today was Thursday, and I will get it done this afternoon.

All of that aside, I've been feeling that urge to do something crafty lately and it's been really strong. I just haven't really done anything because of school work and other things. So yesterday I thought about pulling out some of my coloring books, I have a couple put out by Dover- Fairies, Steampunk, Goddesses, and my colored pencils. But then I got to talking to a friend on Facebook about the camping trip we are going on soon with the pagan group. I ended up chatting with her for a couple of hours and perusing Pinterest for some camping food ideas. I want something simply, but I don't want us all to not actually have meals. I've made a check list of what we are taking and then made a separate list for some food ideas. Since Skoora and I don't have a lot of money and the two friends riding along with us don't have much either, we're keeping everything cheap and simple and one of said friends wanted to know if we could compile a list of food we want and then split up the cost. It sounds like a plan. And it sounds like a ton of fun! I can't wait for it.

My plans for today are to get that Humanities homework finished, finish up the laundry, and make some time to actually sit down and color for a bit. I want to take some time to work on that book for my Grandparents I still haven't finished as well. Then some reading and some writing before bed.  
   

Hell's Gate Camping Trip

This picture was not taken by me. 

At the beginning of this week Skoora and I headed down to Moscow to visit some friends before gathering said friends up for a small camping trip. Our destination was a place in Lewiston but no one in my car seemed to know or remember the name of the place.

The drive was nice except for a little patch of road just before you get to Lewiston. You have to drive through a bit of mountains and while the road wasn't bad, the strong gusts of wind were enough to put me on edge.

At first we went the wrong way, because whoever designed the streets had to have been drunk or high, but we figured it out and got on the right track again and finally arrived at the camp ground. When I saw the signs I couldn't help but think 'Hell's Gate, well that's an uplifting name'. Honestly, I wasn't expecting much since the mountains surrounding the camp were brown and grassy, with an absence of trees. Everything around, city and Snake River aside, looked kind of barren. The further we got into the park things changed. Lush, green grass blanked the ground. Tall trees stood, providing shade. There were small cabins, a nice place to use the bathroom and shower. Plenty of camping spots with fire pits and picnic tables, even electric hookups. Really, this park has a lot to offer but I couldn't help but feel like this was a planted park. A place where people came in and planted the trees and grass to create a space. Not that there's anything wrong with that, I just don't know if I feel exactly cheated or not. I can't explain it to myself so I have no hope of explaining it to you.

After we pulled into our spot we set up camp. There were two runs made to the Clarkston Wal-Mart, the first of which I had gone on. I opted out of the second one since my back was killing me and I wanted to keep a fellow camper company. I feel bad because I don't really know him and ended up rambling while everyone else was gone. I have been assured that was okay and I'm glad because honestly that hour and half would have crawled on if we'd spent it in an awkward-I-don't-know-you-so-I'm-not-going-to-talk-to-you kind of silence.

I did get a couple of pictures before it started to rain. They aren't very good but it's a new camera and I'm still trying to get used to it.

Speaking of the rain, once it started it didn't really stop. Everything was soaked and I think everyone's tent leaked in some fashion. Everything we left out on the picnic table was soaked and where there is darkness and moisture there are earwigs. I actually went to bed early half because I was in so much pain I couldn't stand it anymore, and also because earwigs were dropping down on me from the tree I was sitting under. EWW! Worse, when I was laying down in the tent trying to sleep, I could see them crawling on the outside of my tent in the firelight. Also, someone let their dog take a crap outside our tent during the night. I don't know who but it wasn't a pleasant thing to wake up to.

We left early the next morning. We'd had enough of the rain and someone of my fellow campers had to get back to town so they could shower and go to work. It's been a couple of days and I am still recovering from the trip physically. I didn't play and bounce around like my friends, in fact I took it easy but somehow, the chair I was sitting in, the drive, already being in pain, and getting in and out of the tent just really fouled me up. Still, aside from the bugs and back pain it was a good trip. I just wish my parents had been there with all of their camping stuff. My Mom and Dad would have cooked us a fantastic meal in real camping fashion. My Dad has all sorts of stories from when he worked on the Dude Ranch in Colorado he could have told, plus my Dad has a banjo. Sure, none of my friends would have really enjoyed a bluegrass element but I sure would have.

Actually one of my fondest memories was when I was little and there was a night full of severe weather. There is a support beam and pole that runs through the middle of the basement and my Dad put me (and my favorite stuffed animals) next to it on a pallet and stood a mattress set up, the box springs on one side of me and the mattress on the other. Mom lit candles and sat somewhere, I'm not sure where because I couldn't see her, and Dad set up a spot for himself in front of me. He took out his banjo and played and sang for us until I fell asleep. It was awesome!