Frustration over Fiction, something different, and aches

There is a definite need to break away from the crap going on in my life. This morning I woke up feeling so awful. Aside from this being a fibromyalgia flare up day, my body hurts on top of that due to having to have my legs propped up for most of yesterday. They were terribly swollen again. My head hurt, even my eyelids and eyes hurt. Sometimes I wonder if I feel this bad at 33, what the hell is 43 or even 53 going to be like and that just opens to the door for my depression monster to come for  visit. I've had enough of that bitch. 

So despite feeling terrible, I drug myself out of bed, got dressed, and stepped outside for a smoke- because I'm apparently still doing that- for the time being. The landscape guys are out mowing the lawn, a thing I detest because I am allergic to pretty much all grasses, and generally tend to itch even with my allergy meds. Thankfully they had already been out front and were mowing elsewhere. As I leaned against the metal carport column, I relaxed and actually smiled. I'm not a big fan of bright sunshine as I have light sensitivity, but it is a fucking gorgeous day out. The air is crisp, has that early morning dewy scent. The birds are out, excitedly chirping and flitting about for the insects stirred from the lawnmower. I think we might have a hawk's nest in the tall evergreen that sits at the apartment complex entrance. I've seen it flying and watching, hunting near there and coming in and out of the green branches. The chill in the air was a bit invigorating and woke my sluggish brain up a little more. It reminded me of how much I would like a porch swing in my someday backyard. I want to curl up in the shade, slowly rocking, with my eyes closed and just be. I used to lay on my Great Grandma Ireland's porch swing with my head in her lap. She'd chat with my Grandma or sing me songs or tell me stories and we'd slowly rock back and forth. Those were probably some of the few times anyone could ever get me to sit still as a child.

But, moving on.  

It's getting to be that time of year again- National Novel Writer's Month, which thankfully is in November. A couple of my friends are already signed up and gearing to begin the adventure of 30 days of word vomiting 50,000 words to make a novel. That sounds gross, but when you're writing a first draft of something on a time limit, you're pretty much letting your fingers fly over the keys with the intent to just expel the ideas, story, build the world, and characters in such a manner as to get it out, then pick up the good stuff and shed the crap later. The experience can be frustrating, exciting, and surprising in a somewhat self satisfying way. Or you can look at your draft at the end and groan and wonder just what the hell you were thinking. Still, after 30 days, you will have written more or less than 50,000 words and that is an accomplishment all on its own. 

This year I'm not sure if I will be participating. There is a part of me that says, "no, it might actually be too much". But the other part says "go for it and actually push this shit out". I've "won" NaNoWriMo several times in that I've completed 50,000 words in a month or less. However, nothing I have done within that time frame has ever been finished. Which is a problem for someone who would love to realize her dream of being a full time published author. 

I told the few friends in my immediate vicinity that I would like to try to do this, to finish something, this year. They are supportive and those that are participating in NaNoWriMo think I should join them in the month long endeavor and we've discussed having write-ins together. A write in generally consists of snacks, coffee and tea, light chatting to bounce ideas off each other, and most importantly writing. Sometimes the writing doesn't happen, but that's okay too. However, with not knowing if I will have to move, trying to knock out 50,000 words might be a problem. So, I told my friends that if I have to move, I can't do it this year. If I don't have to move then I am 100% game. 

But there is another problem. I have several novels to write. There are a couple that I have been working on for years, ones that I have rewritten or restarted because my writing has changed and evolved and I am not satisfied with the story. So, I'm not sure what to write. Which do I pick? 

I confess there is some fear in choosing. What if I fuck it up? What if the characters aren't believable? What if I need to buy commas and can't get away from a certain tense? Dangling modifiers love me. What if when Amanda reads it or I read it to her, she says "that's good, but where's your plot"? Stupid confidence crushing fears. I need to just pick one and go, get it out, and then pick up the pieces after. 

I think to help me pick, to help me decide, I'll spend some time with the things that inspire me. Anime, movies, other novels, music, and even art, all these things help ignite and foster ideas through my emotional connection and reaction to them. The piece above is one such source. I love it, I want t add that sense of betrayal into one of my stories and I already know how it will happen. The scene is already formed its the getting there that's holding me back. 

I could go on, but I'm starting fall asleep. A short nap is in order, I think.

Screw Sleepless in Seattle, it's Sleepless in Spokane, selling my soul, and election day among other things

Not sure who made this, but its so pretty!

I can honestly say that I have never seen Sleepless in Seattle. I remember catching a tiny snip-it of it when I was younger and being so utterly annoyed with it, that I refused to ever watch it. But then again, I've also never liked Meg Ryan. That aside, I've been having a terrible time sleeping, hence the "sleepless in Spokane" title. Lately I've either been too afraid to sleep- not sure why- or I only sleep a couple of hours at a time and can't seem to stay in bed for long. I usually end up on my sofa some time after 2:30 in the morning or around 5 in the morning. I've tried making myself really cold because when you warm up again you're supposed to get sleepy. I've tried reading. I've tried all manner of things. So, today at my doctor's appointment, I am going to ask if I might have some sleeping pills for a week to see if they can help get me back on track. It worked once before. 

The depression and anxiety front isn't getting much better, nor is the physical pain issues, although yesterday I felt a little better. Today, I've had to do a phone interview with the social health and services department and the whole time I was shaking, wanted to vomit, and cry, and felt like I was betraying myself or selling my soul. It was awful and I have to go in to do an in person interview with a social worker. As of right now though, I do get some food stamp assistance. 

It is election day here in the USA. I am not looking forward to it, dreading it actually. My state does voting by mail and I have yet to drop off my ballot at the drop off station. Amanda still needs to fills hers out and then we can drop it off at the library drop off station. I can't help but feel doomed no matter who wins, but I feel less doomed if Hillary wins. 

I haven't done much with National Novel Writer's Month. I have a little over 1,000 words and normally I would be at 20,000 by now. I am just going to have work really hard to catch up. 

Emotionally things for me are getting worse. I read an article yesterday talking about the super moon this month having something to so with it. I hope that 's the case, but if not, I've been trying to convince myself that things have to get worse before they can get better. but how much worse are they supposed to get? Where do you draw a line in the sand and say, enough is enough? More than once I've had the feeling of not knowing who I am anymore and that I'm not going to make it. When I told Amanda, she asked me why and how I think I am not going to make it. I don't know what to tell her because I don't know why or how. It doesn't make sense to me. Oh well. It;s time for me to get ready to go to my doctor's appointment. I am hoping this visit is a good one.

That's not what that means and when the pain keeps you up.

well this is a lie...

You know those silly little tests and quizzes you can find on the internet. Well, some of my Facebook friends were doing the one above and I refuse to link to it because it is inaccurate. Hannah or the Japanese equivalent of my name "Hana" means flower in Japanese, not Star as my first run through of this test said, and not warrior. But I did like the picture and while my name may not mean warrior, I am going to keep this and maybe print it out for a manifestation board because it is something to hang on to when I'm down. And I have been really, horribly down lately. 

Pain has kept me awake longer and and more frequently lately. I didn't sleep the night before last, had to take Amanda to work, and finally crashed from plain and simple exhaustion after 10 am yesterday. I awoke around 2 pm. Last night it took Amanda trying to tell me a story- she fell asleep-, me throwing the blankets off me to get cold and then warming up, and telling myself a story, getting up and down a few times, before I finally got some sleep. I don't know what time it was but what I do know is that it was almost 1 pm before I awoke today and I awoke in a lot of pain. I haven't been able to quell said pain all day. I tried applying Tiger Balm to all the places that hurt and then some lavender lotion to my hands so that I might relax and sleep, but I just could not get comfortable. Between poor Amanda's snoring (she had sleep apenea and her doctor is working on getting her a Cpap) and the pain, I just said fuck it, and surrendered to the living room. I thought, I might as well try to write since I had a bit of the urge to write today. 

That's not working out so well for me at the moment. I've been to facebook, went to the National Novel Writer's Month website and set up my novel for this year, and have even opened a word document. So far, not one word of my novel has been written. Okay, that's not totally true. I am working on a novel that I tried and have failed to write for the last couple of years. It's a long, depressing story, and maybe I just wasn't ready to write it when I thought I was. Whatever. Suffice it to say, while I was actually kind of dreading signing up and participating in NaNoWriMo this year, and I am late to the party, I am going to do it anyway. 

 My Dad is apparently taking up the challenge this year too. He asked me how many words I had written and when I told him none, he said he had me beat because he has 300+. He and my Mom were on their way to my Grandparent's house and in the background I could hear my Mom instructing me to send her some of my new stories because she is out of things to read again. I don't have that many, just the ones I did for school... But this was pretty much the politest way my Mom could crack her whip and tell me to get my ass in gear. She can be a real bitch with all the "now now now" stuff (she has OCD). But in this instance, it was actually kind of nice.   

Swollen and the Clorox Kitty

He looks cute but don't let that fool you.

The handsome shit-head to your left is Galen Gladamir. He's one of my cat and I'm pretty sure he's got some electrical problems. He's actually an asshole most of the time but in the last year or so, he's been getting rather needy and cuddly with me. Me, the person he hisses at when she take her towel off after a shower, and yes, he really did do that. He hisses at you when you walk passed him too, or if you look at him wrong or, well just look at him. Once, I told him that I loved him and he growled at me. So, I told him that I hated him and he stopped. What the hell, right?

Anyway, this dumb cat was caught licking Clorox off the bottom of the shower several months back which nearly gave me a heart attack and he was caught trying to do it again today. We think he might have actually gotten a little because he was really weird afterward. He kept sniffing and rolling around on the hallway floor as if he'd had some catnip. *Sigh* He's okay, just stupid. I have a feeling he will be underfoot constantly in the morning. We're cooking a turkey for Thanksgiving. He loves turkey and chicken and roast, and anything meaty really. He stole a piece of chicken out of the fridge once, even got past the plastic wrap covering it. He eats bread and never ever ever eat pizza unguarded. He'll rip that right out of your hand and run off with it. I'm not kidding.

As for swollen, I have been craving a lot of salt lately, don't know why. So, I've kind of been seeking out saltier foods and salting my food a little more than usual. (when I was a kid, I used to pour a little salt in my hand and eat it plain) So, in turn, I'm retaining water and am now swollen. If I can't get the swelling down overnight by having my feet up, then I'll have to take a water pill tomorrow morning. Very annoying, but if it helps, then I'll do it and drink more water. That's something else. I drank soda nearly all day two days in a row this week and if it wasn't soda it was coffee the rest of the time. I haven't done that in a long time.

I am almost finished with NaNoWriMo. If I can just crank out the last 5,000 or so words, I will win it. My novel is far from being finished, even 1st draft speaking. In fact, I'm having a lot of trouble with it and you don't even want to know what it looks like. Word Vomit isn't the correct term, it's much worse but I'm having trouble getting it out. The story bugs me when I am away from it and then says "haha, just kidding"  when I sit down to actually write. Ugh!  Needless to say it's been really frustrating and I actually toyed with the possibility of getting some rum, and seeing what I could do while slightly intoxicated. But I scrapped that because I take pain pills for my back and I don't really want to mix the two. The good news is, once I finish Nano, I am setting this story aside for a little bit to work on some Chritmas/Yule crafts, get a present or two finished, and just take a needed break from the story all together. A fresh pair of eyes, not being stressed out by who's coming when and what we still have left to do, might help. (We have a family Christmas party on December 7th, Skoora's family)

Well, I hope everyone has a happy and safe Thanksgiving. We are going to eat, play games, and if American football is playing on TV, I will happily find myself in another room doing something else.  

More procrastination...

Picture speaks for itself.

I'm supposed to be writing right now. Actually, I should have been writing hours ago but my Dad sent me a text and asked if I was going to e Guild Wars this evening. I decided then that I would just get on and play for a little bit then get on with my business. 

Dad and I did a faction run and then went to the Underworld and wouldn't ya know it, our old alliance leader sent me a message and when I responded, he didn't say a damned thing back to me. Instead he decided to chat with my Dad. Normally that wouldn't piss me off except that old Alliance leader has decided that the alliance we are in right now isn't a very good one. Apparently our alliance leader kicked a guild that the old Alliance leader has always had good relations with out. Which upset him and there's some other stuff to go with it but honestly, I just don't care about our alliance leader's issues with another guild. It's just none of my business. What pisses me off is that the old alliance leader consistently ignores the fact that I am the guild leader of my guild. He doesn't discuss things with me. I always hear about something from my Dad despite the fact that the old alliance leader can contact me on facebook, which I am on at least once a day. And it wouldn't even bother me so much if he hadn't tried to steal my Dad from my guild. But now he wants to jump ship on the alliance and go to another alliance but says he isn't going to go unless he can get both his guild and mine in. Whatever. My Dad and I haven't even decided if we are going with him or not. 

Dad and I don't like all this in game drama. When I get on GW I just want to play, not see or deal with other people's crap, and honestly, my Dad and I would like to be able to do other things besides faction run. I have titles I want to max out. I have areas I want to vanquish and I can't do that if I am always faction farming. Most importantly, I do not want to have to log on every day to faction farm. I have other things that I need and want to be doing. It's not that I don't want to play or think of faction farming as a chore or don't want to contribute, it's just that I am 29 years old and have a social life, live in a house with four people and three cats, and can't always be online every night and weekend. I get on when I can. *sigh* 

But yeah, I'm procrastinating and watching Criss Angle: Believe at the moment. I need to turn off the TV and get to work. I really want to get some head way and just really pound out the story. I have been procrastinating so bad I had to change my desktop background and the color scheme for the windows. I know, I am terrible. 

Tap tap tap, these nails are getting in the way!

I snagged this picture from facebook.

Today is the start of National Novel Writer's Month and yes, I did Camp NanoWriMo this summer, and was going to opt out of doing the November round, but a friend of mine asked to be my buddy. So, here I am doing NaNoWriMo again this year. It's my hope that in doing it again I can knock myself out of the 'hyper editing' funk that I have been in and just get the damned story out. I can go back and edit the hell out of it later. 

I do have to get a grocery list made but after that and writing this blog post, it's time to pick up where I left off with Chloe. Grr, I have a feeling that I am going to get really frustrated though. It's the fake nails that I put on for Halloween. They are getting in the way and sometimes slip off the keys. Not fun. Oh well. Here I go!

Happy Halloween/ Samhain!

I used to have this decoration when I was little. 

Happy Halloween/ Samhain to everyone! I hope that you all have a safe and fabulous night tonight. We aren't doing much this evening. Last year we had two trick or treaters so we aren't expecting anyone to show up at our door tonight. If we buy candy it'll just be for us.

I am going to make tater-tot casserole with some vegetables for dinner and for dessert I'm making a pumpkin cake. After dinner we are going to watch a few movies and a little more of Hemlock Grove on Netflix. Really it's just going to be an evening to relax before Nation Novel Writer's Month kicks off and that will happen at midnight. Oh maybe instead of candy we should get coffee creamer that way I can stay awake. LOL.     

No warning title.

I have decided that I really loathe the show chopped on the food channel.  I'm just so sick of watching it, of listening to the judges, and well all of it. And for some reason Skoora's mother just loves all the competition reality TV shows. That aside, I really wish the TV could be turned off once and in a while, for more than two minutes. I mean really, you couldn't find anything on two minutes ago, what's changed now? And for the love of the Gods, watch the TV or shut up! It's hard to handle one conversation while the TV is going much less two. More importantly can't you see that I am trying to do something. Hint, if my fingers are moving over the keys, I'm busy.

Apparently our neighbors, the ones above us, have completely ignored the letter sent out by management about noise after 10 pm. They had people over and have been stomping since 10 pm.

Things have not been going very well for me lately. My back has been really bad the last three weeks and the most comfortable place for me to sit, where I have the least amount of pain, where I can semi have a rational coherent thought is in the living room. The TV, the constant conversations, the noise from upstairs, none of that would bother me so damned much if I wasn't in pain. Also, if I didn't feel utterly overloaded. This is the part that I've been trying really hard to assuage per se.

I used to work (and or go to school), clean, do laundry, cook, run errands (sometimes for multiple people), have a little of a social life, read, and write every day and did so for several years. I was the person people went to when they needed help. I had focus, drive, and even though I suffered from depression and anxiety, I could get up the next day and do it all over again. Dare I say it I had hope as well.

Some things happened over a year ago that really screwed with me mentally and about that time my back got really bad and hasn't gotten better since. Needless to say I fell like both are and have destroyed me. I literally have to give myself a laundry list, one I keep full, to get out of bed in the morning. I cling to the little things I can do, when I am able to do them, just because they make me feel like I have some semblance of purpose.  I am unable to support myself financially, which is difficult enough. Having to have my girlfriend come in to help me take a shower, to help me get dressed, and use the bathroom is devastating and it's taking it's toll especially during NaNoWriMo month.

I have been having so much trouble trying to focus on writing, on writing much of anything really. Even e-mails have been difficult. It doesn't seem to matter what time of day I try to sit down and write, I just don't seem to be able to do much. I am so behind on the word count target it's not even funny. Sure there is time left in the month but I'm scared that I won't make it. Most people would say it's no big deal but to me it really is. I do not have much to be proud of and NaNoWriMo, completing it and being a winner is one of the only things I do have. And I feel like the ability of finishing this year is being stolen from me.

So because I can't really focus on writing and being upset about it, I haven't really done a lot of things that I would like to do which only drives me nuts. I have things that I need to get done, just small things and nothing out of the ordinary. One of my friends said that I should give myself a break. I wish I could but I really can't. I have to do things, I have to keep going, even if like most days, I am so exhausted at the end of the day that I can barely keep my eyes open. I'm not going to school, I am unable to work, if I don't feel like I am contributing in some way, and keeping myself busy so I don't go nuts in the mean time, then the depression is so much worse.

And lastly, I am so lonely. The people I am most comfortable with, aside from Skoora who I feel terrible for venting to a lot, are the furthest away. 

NaNoWriMo time again!

It's National Novel Writer's Month again. I've had a very slow start. I wanted to finish in ten days or less but it doesn't look like I am going to make that this year. Frankly I would be happy just to finish at all at this point. My back is giving me hell which in turn makes it hard to focus. However, I am trying and I will finish!

My project for this year is to work on a novel I previously wrote but never finished. I've decided to remove an element and play up others. I haven't looked at my previous draft and I don't think I am going too. I would really like to somewhat start fresh. The plan is to begin at the beginning and see where it takes me. I'll remember the good stuff and add it in like I remember it and hopefully make it better. Oh and the book is about vampires and no I am not going to go into the details. I do hope to publish this book so no peeking for you.

Camp NaNoWriMo!

Today is the beginning of Camp NaNoWriMo! It is the same as National Novel Writer's month in that people who sign up write 50,000 words by the end of the month. It's essentially word vomit but at least you've gotten your ideas out on paper and can work from there.

Usually the Girlfriend and I would only do NaNoWriMo in November but this year I really wanted to try doing two. I have a novel that I have been trying to get out of me for awhile now (I have a few like that). You're supposed to start from scratch but I don't always. I will take a project that needs rewriting and start from the beginning and see where the rewrite takes me and then after NaNoWriMo is over I will take the best stuff from the first and 2nd or 3rd drafts and stitch them together to make a stronger piece of work. Last November I wrote a collection of short stories that still need to be edited and fine tuned and tweaked. Some further research needs to be done for one of them.

Anyway, we are geared up and ready to begin. We have coffee, snacks of pizza rolls, bagels, and chips (all the naughty stuff, we're going to get some fruit and veggies later). We have even set the girlfriend's mother up so she can particiapte too! I'm excited because I know what story she's going to be working on and I think it's freaking awesome! Meanwhile mine will have the usual death, sadness, and of course romance! I just need to finish cooking the pizzas and I am good to go on my end.

If I am still up, I will be going to the Kroc to swim at 5am. There are so few people there I can really move around, plus, no children. God love them but they are damn annoying when they decide you are their new best friend and have to tell you their life story. Cute, but I can't get my exorcise done with a kid yakking at me, mainly because I feel the need to pay attention instead of blowing them off. :)

Just thoughts...

Yesterday, I awoke at 11 am but went back to bed to try and convince my girlfriend to get up and also because my back was bothering me. I thought using the back massager would help ease the pain a little if not work out some of the tension. Apparently it worked well enough for me to fall asleep and I didn't wake until 4 in the afternoon. I must have needed the sleep but I was annoyed because that meant I wouldn't get the things I need to accomplish for the day done.

Well, after I got over it, I set out to do what I could. I did my math homework, got dressed, and went to school. We did so much in class last night. Three tests, a writing assignment, and took notes and reviewed for next week's final. Surprisingly, class let out early.

When I got home, I didn't do much. I was kind of tired so I checked my facebook, discovered a word game and played it awhile, then decided if I was going to be up, I might as well work on NaNoWriMo stuff.
There were a few times that I started to doze off but now I'm wide awake and its past 5:30 am. I should have been in bed a long time ago.

The upside is that my cats have been extremely entertaining. Galen has been snoring off and on all night and making the strangest sounds. When he's been awake, he's managed to wiggle his fat butt behind the entertainment center, jump up in the entertainment center and for whatever reason paw at the back of it. It was really weird and I thought for sure he'd get stuck trying to get out.

Yoda on the other hand, has been doing what he always does, sleeping. A few times he's been awake and insistent upon being either on me or pawing at me to pet him. He talks in his sleep, I've decided. He makes some weird little noises too.

At some point I have to get some sleep, I just don't know if I want to do it now or look over what I've written for NaNo tonight. There's something about it that doesn't feel right, which will make the 3rd short story I've had problems with. It's very irksome and unsettling. And it will probably bother me so much that I won't be able to really sleep.

Words words words, lack of sleep, and math.

I have had about 30 mins of sleep since I last posted. I've been up basically 35 and a half hours.

I stayed up to make it to my appointment with my math instructor and got my grade up up to a B+ and it will probably go up still. While I was taking a make up test the department chair came in and sat down. He startled me because I was expecting my math instructor and not him. Startled and upset in finding someone I was trying to avoid sitting next to me and interrupting my test, I greeted him. He asked me how I was doing and why I missed class Tuesday.  I explained that I had not been able to move very well and was in a lot of pain. I told him that I was still in a lot of pain and sufficiently drugged just to be there then to get my math grade up. I think this man is less concerned about my welfare and more about school success statistics because proceeded to lecture me about my poor attendance (something out of my control mind you) and asked if I had spoke to my Dc Electronics instructor. I flat told him that I hadn't. His response was that he didn't even know if I could get my grade up in that class.I didn't tell him that I have pretty much given up on passing DC Electronics with a good grade nor did I tell him that I had planned sometime ago that no matter the grade earned, I am going to retake the class to be sure to understand everything.

He stayed a few minutes more, lecturing me, until my math instructor returned with another quiz I had to make up. He paused and said that the math I was doing was important. I wanted to say 'Well, duh!' but restrained myself.

After I was finished at school, the gf and I went to out to lunch because a) we haven't been in awhile and b) we were really hungry and too tired to make something at home. When we were finished, we came home, played on the computer for a few minutes and the lay down in the living room. My gf got to sleep for several hours but I did not. I slept for half an hour and awoke when my Dad came home from work. I was just about to sleep when my Dad cursed my cat and shifted back and forth trying to decide what to do. Yoda had gotten into the dog food again and promptly puked it up on my Dad's nice, black trench coat. It was an awful mess. So I got up and sent my Dad on his way to change clothes and give my mom the soda she'd asked for. I cleaned up the nasty puke and then spent the evening fending off said cat. He's a very cuddly kitty but after I sat down, he refused to leave me alone. He had to be on me in some fashion or another and he bitched at me if I wasn't petting him.

Giving up on sleep, I decided to use my evening for NaNoWriMo. I typed some of the story one handed thanks to Yoda. I'm also not very fond of the story I worked on, it moves fast, feels like two different stories, and just ugh! I'm not happy with it, it feels weird. I'm not going to work on it any more, I've set it aside to be rewritten later, when I'm not so sleep deprived. Also, I think part of my problem was in my note taking. I practically wrote the whole plot of the story in one page and every time I do very detailed and extensive notes I somehow manage to ruin the story and make myself hate it. At least the sex scene was good, even if I did write 'his fighters' instead of 'his fingers'. I blame lack of sleep.

In the end I've managed to reach 27,162 words for NaNo and it's only day 10. I know I did much better last year, hell I wrote 50,000 words in 19 days... But I wasn't going to school nor did I have back issues.

Speaking of my back. It;s a little better. I'm standing up straighter and moving around a little better. The burning sensation seems to have passed. AHHH! Yoda is back and looking up at me with large, expectant eyes!

*sigh* I am a slave to my cat. And I'm wide awake.

Wow! I really wrote a lot!

I've stayed up all night to write for NaNoWriMo and I now at 22020 words! I've got three stories done for my eleven short story project and am hoping, after I get my homework done in the next few days, that I can get one more finished. I just have to decide which story I want to do next, find suitable names for characters, and make some notes.

I'm kind of dreading doing my homework. It's a lot of math and a few papers for Micro econ, but I'm hoping to be done with all of it by Friday so I can get back to writing for NaNo.

I'm kind of tired and my back is bothering me but I'm afraid to lay down for fear of missing my appointment with my math instructor at eleven. Then again, if I don't get a little rest, I might just fall asleep while at my appointment. What to do?

Oh well, I'll figure something out.

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween! My medicine-foggy brain just realized it was 12:30 and thus the 30th of October had given itself over to the 31st.

What are your plans for this evening? Have anything ghoulish in mind?

Unfortunately I have my trigonometry class tonight from 6pm to 10:30 pm so that's killed any plans I might have had, which kind of sucks since Halloween is my favorite holiday of the year. However, my college is having a family oriented celebration that begins at 5pm, so I will at least get a little fun for an hour before class begins and I am sure I will find something to do with my family afterwards. Also, I get to dress up, provided that it's acceptable attire. No worries there. I don't really have a costume readily at my fingertips. They're, the few I have, are all packed away.

So, I am going to probably go as a vampire or an Japanese demon. At least, do the really awesome make up I saw in Onmyoji. I can't find a pic of her so I will have to get a screen shot later to post. I haven't decided on the make up and probably won't until I am actually working on my face tomorrow afternoon. As for what to wear... We're doing laundry as I work on this post and I will pick something out from the clean clothes... That reminds me, I wonder if I can wear one of those dresses we've got hanging up in the wardrobe I can't quite get in to...

As I aforementioned, I'm suffering from a medicine-foggy brain tonight. While my back is getting gradually better, I still have a lot of pain, and I am incredibly stiff. So I've been stretching as much as I can and tonight I was forced to take a muscle relaxer and my dumb-ass took a whole one instead of breaking it in half. I think I might have cat-napped off and on while playing sims on facebook. I gave up on it and apparently thought I was done with the computer and put it on hibernate, only I'm not finished with the computer, I still have some homework to do and I wanted to listen to some music while doing it.

Of course with it being Halloween, that means tomorrow is a very important day. It's the beginning of National Novel Writer's Month and I decided that I am going to participate again this year. I don't actually know if I will reach my 50,000 words due to school/homework, moving, and spending time with family and friends before I go, but I have a set of short story ideas I want to work on and a novel I want to work on. The short stories will be put together to make a small collection book and they are very naughty! ^.^

Well, I've got homework to do and clothes to fold, so I'm off! Hope everyone has a safe and fun Halloween!