15 and 5, two weddings, the Munsters, sleep

 Above is the beautiful cake cousin Kat made for Selene and I for our 5th wedding anniversary. She organized our little back yard party too. It was a really nice affair complete with music, a fire in the fire pit, food, and friends. It's hard to believe it's already been five years. It feels like forever ago, but maybe that's because there was a lot of pain and dark depression surrounding that day and for a long while after. There was good stuff too, but often the bad outweighs the good for me until the emotions around it fade. I think it also feel like forever ago because Selene and I have been together for fifteen years. And odd as this sounds, our time together seems like forever and also "has it really been that long? doesn't seem like it".   But, I am happy to say that the pain and dark depression circumstances that made the actual days around our wedding have faded enough that I had a really good time and I was able to relax and enjoy it. Not that I didn't enjoy my wedding, I enjoyed the ceremony and loved all the people who came, still love them, it was just an equally hard time as it was a good one. 

At the beginning of the month, our friend Rachel got married to her long time boyfriend. Selene and I couldn't have been happier for them. We love them both and they are really good together. More than that, they have both become family. We are truly blessed to know them both. And we are extra happy because Rachel has been resistant to the notion of marriage. I won't go into why, but seeing her change her mind and realize that not all marriages are one way or another, has been cool. Not that I am saying everyone has to get married or should get married, to each their own, I just think its cool she did. 

Two days after our anniversary, our friend Bethy got married to her girlfriend Corey. Bethy and I have had our ups and downs, as all friends have, and we have been friends for as long as Selene and I have been together. Selene used to work at the high school where Bethy went to school and was friends with Selene's cousin. That's how we all met. It's been really interesting too see Bethy 'grow up' from her senior year of high school, her college years, living with us for a time- which so didn't work out- to now. Things aren't exactly easy for her but she's doing her best. And, she's found a very sweet and patient woman to spend the rest of her life with. The best part, Corey quietly calls her out on her shit, and I think that's good for Bethy. I think, in a way, it helps ground her. Best of all they talk, they talk about communicating with each other, they know things aren't going to be perfect, and they are both willing to do the work, which is one of the best tools they have in their tool box.  But aside from that, they asked me to do their make up for their special day and I was honored. 

After all the chaos and almost non-stop going of the last several weeks, I got a few days to just breathe. Of course, that meant that I slept a lot and I do mean a lot. I even fell asleep with coffee in my hand and spilled it all over myself. While I am a little sad I slept so much, I'm also not too broken up about it. My body needed that time to heal. Honestly, I could go for a nap right now, but I am holding off in favor of doing some things for myself today amidst getting a little house work done and trying to figure out when to set up the kitchen remodel and so on... because things still need to be done. And, I want to try writing today. I really haven't done it, been too busy, too anxious, too scared to fuck it up, too scared I will disappoint myself because it's not good enough, ect...

But all of that aside, I did manage to see Rob Zombie's "The Munsters". It wasn't bad. I don't think anything will be as good as the original series and no one can truly be Lily Munster like Yvonne de Carlo. Still, the movie was good. I had to watch it 3 times before I saw it all the way through-because I kept falling asleep. It's a prequel movie, a how Herman and Lily came to be together and how they moved to America. Rob Zombie, I think, did a good job in keeping as true to the original as possible while adding his own flare. I enjoyed it.  

Enumclaw and Witch's Night Out...

 

Enumclaw is a nice little Washington town set not too far from Tacoma with forest and mountain views. There are lots of neat little shops in the downtown area, one of which is called Roaring Underground. It's a cute shop with some vintage clothing, trinkets, souvenirs, and so on, but the back of the shop has a speakeasy. No, really, it does, you have to have a password to get in for drink! The lovely ladies who own and run this shop do the Magical Northwest events and the very one that puts on Witches Night Out! Right next door to Roaring Underground is a shop called Magickal Earth, a store that has crystals, tarot, herbs, incense, and more. And not too far from downtown is a little café called Charlie's Cafe. Their breakfast was amazing, the staff are super sweet, and the whole restaurant is just super cute and homey. 

Why am I telling you about these places? Well, because I was a vendor at this event, this year. It was fun, an experience, and I am glad I got to meet these people and see how they do things. I say this not just as a vendor but also a board member for Northwest Pagan Fest. I am always observing how people do things so I can decide if their way is better or something they do could work for me or not. 

As a vendor, I didn't do so well, at least, not as an out of town vendor. I made just enough to cover the vendor fee and my hotel stay. I am okay with that. I learned some things, had some fun, and I got to ride the ferry again- because we didn't just hang out in Enumclaw, we went to Bremerton, Kent, and other places. (places like Sweet Kitty Anime, Daiso, Tokyo Lifestyle, Helm's Deep Tavern, The Naval Museum)

The downside of the event, and this is in no way a criticism of the people running it, I think they did a wonderful job. The downside is that a sizeable portion of the customers of the event are very "Normie, Crunchy Mom" and less pagan/wiccan.  As an event for the community, it was a success and something that is really good for the area. I am really sad that there was an asshole in a truck revving his engine as he sped by several times a night. I am sad that people came to an event like that and were annoyed about actual pagan/wiccan/ witchy things were for sale- yeah, I had several of those- which is kind of funny since I was set up right across from a pagan shop. What the hell were you expecting? 

Anyway, over all it was good. 

The Belleview Bathroom Incident

I had to pee. I wasn’t going to make it to cousin Mike’s house, who lives in another town along our path to head home. We were in a shopping area and had been in Daiso for a while. I realized I needed to use the bathroom but they didn’t have one open to the public. Cousin Kat had to go to the sporting goods store find something for her mother. She also had to use the bathroom but I was pretty sure if I got out of the car I would need a short path to the toilet. I didn’t want to get all the way into the store only to have to book it back to the car because the bathroom was closed or not open to customers. It’s a movement issue. If I stay put, I can hold a little longer and hang in there on the superfast- almost run (I don’t run) waddle to the toilet. But…

Something has happened in our society. We don’t seem to care when others need to use the bathroom. I understand no one wants to clean up after a homeless person because they may or may not trash the facilities or use drugs. I understand covid has also made it so people don’t want to open bathrooms to the public. But when a person needs to pee. Let them fucking pee!

Anyway, so, we waited for Kat. She was fast. Things were beginning to get a little painful for me and she reported that the distance to the bathroom was far. So, I decided, I’ll just drive to the Starbucks just down the street. This Starbucks… firstly, since when do coffee shops close at 4pm on a Sunday afternoon? They all used to be open until at least 8 pm if not later. But I digress, I parked, I got out of the car and speed waddled my fat ass into the store. I was almost to the bathroom when the manager and an employee walked out. She said to me “I’m sorry we close at 4.” I was confused but brushed it off and said. “Okay, can I just use the bathroom really fast?” I had wallet in hand, was nicely dressed, looked clean and was planning to buy something for using their facilities. Her response, “no, we close at 4.”  And she was bitchy about it. I didn’t have time for it, so I hurried out of the store. The kid behind the counter called after me, “have a nice day”. 

But it gets better. I hurried over to the Mc. Donald’s except their lobby wasn’t open. So, then I hurried to Subway just a hop away. The employee let me get all the way to the bathrooms and never said a damn thing, let me see the sign he’d put up about the bathrooms being out of service. I actually turned around, glared at him and said “Are you fucking serious, this is the 3^rd damn place!” And now I was about to pee myself, it was getting really painful, and I booked it to my car and hurried to a gas station and guess what?! Their bathroom was closed for remodeling. By this time, I knew for sure if I got out of the car again, I was going to pee and wouldn’t be able to stop it. And I was in tears and trying to decide if it was better to get arrested for pissing in public behind a bush or pee the driver’s seat and sit in it for the 4-5 hour long drive home.

Selene suggested the little Grocery Outlet next to the gas station and I told her I wasn’t getting out of the car just to have to it closed and not make it. She went in to check for me and then I booked it into the store and finally, finally, I got to pee. I was still so upset about all the other places, all of them so close together, in a well to do area, that I didn’t say anything to the employees on the way out of Grocery Outlet. I’m probably going to write them a thank you letter. I know it’s not really necessary, but I really think they need to know how much I appreciated them having an open bathroom.

As for that Starbucks, they didn’t have their door locked and I literally walked into their lobby at 4. I know this because my car clock in a few minutes fast and when I got back in the car, my clock said 2 minutes after 4. They will not be getting a good review from me.  I know people don’t owe me shit and I am not running around with some self-imposed sense of entitlement. However, when you gotta go, you gotta go no matter who or what you are, and public bathrooms are public for a reason. And if you’re a willing paying customer, it’s a no brainer. Hell, I would have cleaned the damn bathroom after me, for them if they had let me use it. No, really, I would have and I would have been quick about it and still bought coffee or a muffin or something.  

Now, will this stop me from shopping at Starbucks? No, just that location.