Friday, July 20, 2012

The Weight Pandemic: Part one: Judgments of friends


I am just down right disgusted with how society is placing so much emphases on weight and appearance. How people aren't good enough, pretty enough, and not worth anything if they are fat. It's cruel, demeaning, and shameful and not to mention there is this unreasonable expectation to be atrociously thin that people are hurting and killing themselves. In fact weight and judging people by their weight has become such an obsession it infects almost every aspect of our lives. You can't go anywhere without seeing or hearing something about weight. Check outlines in stores are littered with 'weight loss secrets and miracle diets', 'how to lose the weight fast', and 'look how much this celebrity gained', ect... You hear about the 'Obesity Epidemic' our nation is suffering from on the news and internet. There are programs on TV that talk about miracle drugs, how people lost weight, and infomercials for exercise equipment. Ads for Lapban, liposuction, and stomach stapling. And all the time everyone is judging everyone by their weight. Hell even my own friends do it.

The other day, when it was so blisteringly hot, I was out along the Coeur d'Alene River with my Girlfriend, her best friend, and her friend's little brother. My back was hurting that day and I would have much rather stayed at home had I not also been heat sick. So we found a place along the river and waded in which was a really good thing. It cooled all of us down especially me and the water was so cold it even helped to ease my back a little. I found a good rock to sit on and still be half in the water as well as help keep an eye on the little brother. 

While we were there my girlfriend's best friend made a rather uncouth and rude comment about another girl walking around the area. She said that the girl shouldn't have been wearing a bikini. When I asked what girl and why, she said the girl was out of sight and because she looked to be about 200lbs. I didn't say anything but I was really pissed and pretty much thought that was one of the shittiest things I have ever heard her say in public. Especially for someone who claims not to judge people on what they look like, wear, ect... And especially for someone who supposedly used to be fat and got picked on all the time in school. 

Now I have never seen a picture of this friend where she was the least bit fat and I've seen several family photos of her and her sister at their high school graduation party a couple of years ago. She has some very interesting eating habits. She swears she doesn't have a problem but when she buys a small bag of trail mix comprised of dried fruits and nuts and talks about how she really needs this bag of trail mix because it has nutrients she needs that she's not getting but she can't eat the whole bag (never mind that it's a really small bag). I get a little frustrated. And she is always making comments about food mostly about how she can't eat this or can't eat that or she wants this but shouldn't eat it. That is if she eats at all. She's decided to become vegetarian, which I respect. She really wanted to be vegan but loved cheese too much. Now all of a sudden she's lactose intolerant? I know problems can develop but I really believe that this lactose intolerance is a 'mind over body I am convincing myself that I can't have dairy so I can really be vegan' kind of thing (except she still eats dairy). And she was bitching about how she hasn't exercised enough lately and that she's gaining weight. Hon, you wear a size 5, gaining a few pounds for the sake of eating right won't fracking kill you.

Another friend of mine, one who, like me, fits under the 'obesity epidemic' posted a video link on facebook about a woman who was entered in the Guinness Book of World Records for being the world's largest woman. The video was about the woman saying that having sex was helping her lose weight. Note, she said 'helping'. Well this friend wanted to know how that was possible since she was so fat and what could this woman do but lay there. 

A bunch of her Trolls jumped on the post and wrote so many horrible, snide, and rude comments about this woman. Even my friend, who is fat too, wrote mean things. There was a comment about how the woman was lying that she couldn't possibly be having sex because she was too fat and if she tried she would die from overexertion. That she's mentally ill. Someone even said that she was a selfish woman and there are people who need to eat and could have used the food she consumed to get so fat and as punishment she should have to do farm work to produce the amount of food she'd consumed to get down to a weight where she isn't a 'giant glutton'. The same person also asked how many leopards died to make her shirt.   

So I watched the video and then went looking for other articles and information about this woman. There was nothing I read or saw where this woman ever stated that she attributed all her weight loss to sex. She does pool therapy. She has changed how she eats. And yes, she has sex with her ex-husband. She said they do a lot of foreplay. She is on the bottom when they have sex, but she is still burning calories. When I took this information and added it the long list of comments and commended the woman for her bravery and courage in coming out publicly about her weight and trying to help herself (she actually contacted the Guinness Book of World Records to see if she was the Largest woman in the hopes that it would shame her into taking action), people kind of shut up. And then my friend, tried to make herself not look like a judgmental ass but kind of failed by stating that she still agreed with some of the things one of her extremely rude Troll/friends wrote. 

What I want to know is who the hell cares how this woman loses weight as long as she is trying? And why are they so busy being invested in her when perhaps they should invest in themselves? And that goes for the skinny friend above. And just because you wouldn't wear a bikini at 200lbs, doesn't mean that that girl wasn't comfortable wearing one. Personally, I am uncomfortable when she runs around without a bra on but it's her prerogative and I'm certainly not going to make a rude comment about it or make her feel uncomfortable for not wearing one or judge her because she likes to let her tits flop around.  

Edit: The reason why I am using the word 'Pandemic' is because this is not just a problem within the United States of America. This is something that is going on World Wide. Just thought I should clear that up.  

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