Last night sleep stood me up, so instead of tossing and turning in bed- and because I was hurting- I decided to get up and do something constructive. I made myself some planner stickers with some pretty moon pictures I found on pinterest. I even made my own template, which was kind of pain because I was basically watching youtube vids and teaching myself how to do stuff- some was refresher, but some of it wasn't.
Since I didn't get sleep last night, I thought I was seeing shit this morning when I took Amanda to the bus stop. Turns out I wasn't, there really was something dangling from my glasses and it was a tiny spider. Normally I would have freaked, cried, and thrown things. But, I think because I was behind the wheel of a car and even though it was in park, something in my head flipped the calm switch. I took off my glasses and got a napkin then squished the thing. Do not say anything that spider broke the treaty. I have a policy if it's in the house Amanda takes it outside or I kill it, same goes for the car, especially since it was ON ME! Anyway, I thought I was doing pretty well except for the rest of the morning I kept thinking stuff was crawling on me and even had moments where I imagined spiders bursting through my skin. Yeah, I was NOT a happy camper. Needless to say after my therapy appointment and after lunch, I promptly sat on the sofa with the heating pad (because I hurt my back again recent- upper back this time) and took a nap. Thankfully sleep didn't stand me up this time.
We've been a bit busy lately. We've had dinner at a friend's house, friends have had dinner here, and we've had a wedding party planning party. Add some errands, grocery shopping, sleeping most of an entire day away, and I haven't really played too much on the internet. Or even really been on my computer that much. But that is going to change per se, after this weekend. A lot is going to change after this weekend, at least for me. I can't wait around anymore on my body or on other people. So I am going to make myself a new schedule and try it out. I know I keep talking about it, but I just need to do it. I need to stop trying to accommodate everyone else and just accommodate myself for a change.