Wednesday, September 5, 2012

If my fingers rest on the keys, that counts as effort.

I have been so listless the last couple of days and mostly apathetic. When I say mostly, I don't really feel anything until I start thinking about trying to write or to read a book and then I just get upset because I have absolutely no drive whatsoever to anything. I am upset that it took me two hours to write a simple e-mail yesterday, something that should have only taken ten minutes.

I've taken naps in the last couple of days because I am so tired after taking my medicine. It's turning me into a zombie and I should just stop taking it. Except that I can't because I read up on it and if you quit cold turkey then it'll be like you have the flu. And I've felt that just from missing my pill one day. I should just deal with the clinic's long asinine phone system to leave a message with my med doctor but I don't like her and the phone system is a pain in the ass. And there is that I don't have much drive to deal with it.

It's American Footballs season again. Have I ever told you how much I loathe American Football? It's a long drawn out process of men lining up to slam into each other. And it almost always takes long than 4 hours. I just don't have the patience for it and I don't like the commentators anyway. I foresee myself spending many hours in my room. Many hours. I may never come out again except to eat, use the bathroom, and leave the house.

Persistent Heartburn has been plaguing me. The tums aren't helping too much any more, just taking the edge off. So I need to find something else, over the counter, until I can get back into the doctor to stop this. since I have the heartburn already, I might as well drink the juice I like. I adore orange juice and cran-grape juice but I don't drink juice very often because of the heartburn. I think I will have ravioli tonight too.

Tonight is the season premier of Ghost Hunters. I am excited!!! I think Paranormal Witness is on tonight as well.  I really enjoy both shows and it will be nice to lose myself in them for a couple of hours. Then I might just go back to bed.

I went looking for some short stories to refurbish and send into some short story contests but the one I really want is M.I.A. Apparently I only have it in hard copy and that copy must be back in Kansas at my parents house. That's kind of depressing because I really loved it and can't remember it well enough (the dialogue was really good) to be able to rewrite it. I did find one that I wrote for college that I might rework. I have an erotic short but I high doubt there are any erotic/BDSM short story contests listed in Amanda's magazine. I'll have to find some online. And I guess I will just have to write some more.

Well, I am off to find my snack!


  1. Have you tried baking soda and water for the heartburn? It's an old fashioned remedy, but it often works for me when nothing else will.

    Maybe you could try Prilosec or one of those other over the counter remedies for chronic heartburn.

    And for sure, get that stupid doctor to get you off that stuff! And don't let her put you on Cymbalta or Effexor either. You'll get the same effects if you forget a dose or can't afford to get it anymore. For some reason, female doctors seem to be really stingy and anti-benzo. They seem to adhere to this insane idea that suffering is good for you, so god forbid you take anything like xanax that would actually help with anxiety and panic. And feel good to boot! :-O

  2. I've had effexor before and I had to get off it because I couldn't afford it.

    No, I haven't tried baking soda and water, I'll have to try that.