A lackluster helloooooo and Happy New Year!

I hope everyone had a wonderful and safe Yule/Jul/ Christmas!

I will eventually post the books we received and maybe some of the movies. Amanda gave me The White Queen which is about Pre-Tutor England. I am excited for it. But posting that stuff will have to wait. I'm far too exhausted and in too much pain to go gather all the books and fight with my camera to do so. My camera is acting up and I'm not sure why. The photo above was taken with my phone but I really don't like my phone camera, it's grainy as hell and I haven't figured out how to tinker with it yet. Not that I have actually tried mind you. 

I finally finished my Water and Fire afghan. I want to do Air and Earth next but I will save that project for a later date. I decided to start an afghan for my cousin because she needs all the love she can get. She requested purple and black and I chose a wave pattern. I started it last night while watching a Nova episode on the Viking Sword which only made me miss the blacksmithing I did when I was in the SCA. Yes, you read right, I did some blacksmithing. I wanted to try everything and found pounding hot metal soothing and was excited to see something take shape and form. We also watched Ever After High and a movie about a cat although I can't remember the name of it. 

Yesterday was an awful sort of day in that I awoke late and in a lot of pain all over, even my toes hurt. It was so awful! I spent an hour or so toying with the idea of going back to bed and Amanda made the decision for me when she arrived home early from work. She made me take some medicine and put me to bed, of course she came with me. She wasn't feeling very well either. Today, I'm not feeling much better but I am going to try taking a hot shower and use some of the wonderful bubbling body scrub that a friend sent us for Christmas. It's soft enough that I don't think it will hurt. Sometimes when I have big flare ups of pain, even my clothes hurt. 

I think Galen has a cold. He's wheezing more than usual and making a very strange cough/gagging sound. He is still eating and drinking and when Amanda gets paid we are going to get him some medicine. 

Well I've sat at my desk as long as I can stand so I am going to go take my shower and hope it helps. Have a happy and safe New Year and I will see you next year! 

   

It's finally over! Post Office Strikes again, subjects I can stand, lack of communication, and yes damn it, more Rocket Raccoon!

Let's start with the obvious. Rocket Raccoon has kind of been a comfort to me. It might seem weird or strange that a cgi gun-toting, foul-mouthed, bomb making raccoon would be comforting, but well, he is. His face reminds me of Yoda, my kitty who passed away this year. Raccoon's are an animal I fell in love with as a child, my parents and family members used to get me plush raccoon toys (I have a small collection), and he just makes me happy. So, the other day when I wasn't doing so well, I watched a little bit of Guardians of the Galaxy, to see Rocket and because its just fun. 

This latest college term is over. I'm not 100% sure of my grades and at this point, I don't care so long as I passed. It was just a crap term and there are better ones ahead. But for now I have a two week break wherein I can actually read something I want to read and study something I want to study, write, do crafts, watch anime, or play games. All things I can stand doing.

So, I learned some new things about a friend that I didn't know. I thought that she merely tolerated me for the sake of her sister and Amanda. Apparently she likes Amanda and me, yes even me, much more than that. This girl is a wall. I read people pretty well but she is mostly a blank to me. Of course she's scared of confrontation and sucks at communication as well, so that doesn't help either of us out. Anyway, she's the maid of honor in a mutual friend's wedding and she needs some help, so I am going to see if I can't help her out. 

I ran out of two colors of yarn I was using for my parents afghan and neither of the places I usually get yarn have those colors in stock. Also, time was limited and I was panicking, so I finished it off, packed a couple of extra goodies into their box, and mailed that off today. 

And speaking of mailing things. Remember that trouble I had with my postal carrier earlier this month where she was basically too lazy to walk my packages down the steps to my door and tried to claim that she didn't know if I lived here despite her delivering my mail here for the last 3 years? Well, it seems another person in the post office has that issue today, this I overheard while boxing up my parent's Christmas present. I was thinking how much it sucked and half a dozen other random thoughts while looking around the counter to see if there was any tape. Found some tape just sitting out near by and used it without a second thought. Well, Amanda and I got up to the counter, talked to the post office employee while she rang up our boxes, and then she asks us about the tape, which we both used. I told her that I did use the tape, that it was lying out on the counter. To which her reply in lecture/chew us out form was that any tape we use from them we have to pay for, she didn't know why someone would do that, and that she wouldn't charge us for it this time. Um... okay, thanks, I think. She was just so rude about it, kind of degrading actually, that we kind of wanted to tell her that next time we'd go to Fed Ex. They tape our boxes for free, are nicer, and closer to where we live. But we didn't. We just paid and left. 

Other than getting really freaked out at the grocery store today because of so many shopper, most of which were cranky (I swear it was like four different people were following me), I got a new wallet today. It is simple, black but it is as big as I need it to be and has a spot for everything I need, plus a zipper part for my change. I also locked the keys in the car. We parked in front of Game Stop to finish our lunch and since Amanda's Dad left the keys in the ignition and ran the battery down, the car no longer dings and it doesn't keep the car unlocked if the keys are still in the ignition, which they were. I got out and locked my door and then realized exactly what I had done. Thankfully, we weren't too far from home. Unfortunately, we had to go into Game Stop to ask to use their phone because I left mine in the car. Amanda's Dad came with the other set of keys shortly after and we were able to go about our day, which for me was full of tears over stupid shit because of this and that and the end of the term and my period. 

Aside from that, we had a fantastic Yule and I will probably post all my Yule Swag later. For now, I am going to relax and take a nice hot shower.  

I have a minute

It's the end of the term so what does that mean for me? Relief dangling in the very near future that I'm crawling closer to everyday. 

This term of college has not been a good one. Worst of all, I don't really feel that I will have accomplished much by the end of it. Sure I will have good grades but it's really taken it's toll on me. I've found myself asking the question of "why am I doing this?" I know why. I want to be a better writer. I want to have my BA so when I am able to return to the work force I can actually go for a career instead of positions I have worked in the past. 

But this term has truly wiped me out. Getting sick in the middle certainly didn't help. Needless to say I've pretty much done homework, every day, all day, except the few days I've just had to decompress. However, I wasn't decompressing enough and that really took it's toll. On top of that I'm having some issues with my period again that are not helping. And it's been one thing on top of another. One issues or stressor compounding another. Ugh! Yesterday I was so exhausted, so just wiped, that for about half the day, intermittently mind you, I sat and stared at the wall. Of course that's when the depression and panic would kick in and I will admit to be a 30 year old woman who sat at her desk and cried while hugging a teddy bear. And then I got angry because of how ridiculous it all was, which only made me cry again. 

I did manage to get some homework done yesterday. I did the last learning module for the Context of Writing class and took the notes I should have taken for my paper weeks ago. Why I didn't take them weeks ago, two works, Math Hell. Since I got all of that done and out of the way yesterday, I can write my paper to day. And like last night, as soon as that is finished, I am going to do a little self care and watch something I want to watch (instead f what everyone else wants to watch) and crochet. Doing that last night really helped and I felt kind of good this morning when I awoke. Yes, I was in pain like I am everyday with the added bonus pain of a head ache, but otherwise, I felt much better. 

While I have been dealing with homework, there's been other things going on. We are deeply disappointed in a set of friends for one. We are in the continuing battle to balance things out here at home. We are looking for other possible places to move and looking for another job for Amanda. We are trying to get out and do things with the IEPG as often as we are able. Both of us are worrying over my parents and their situation. We are worrying about Amanda's parents as well. And I've got some troubling health concerns to discuss with my doctor. A couple people are pushing to me to get my thyroid levels checked. I'm worried that my wheat allergy has gotten worse. And I am beginning to have trouble with my legs swelling again. But going to the doctor will just have to wait until after New Year's. I just don't have time between now and then or the money up front for the lab work. 

On the plus side, both Galen and Narcisa are napping on the bed and they both look so adorable. I want to curl up next to them but I on'y took time out to write a blog to get my writing muscles warmed up so I can write my 9-12 page paper on Harper Lee and her book To Kill a Mockingbird.     

Cleaning, homework woes, shocking and sad news, Rocket Raccoon!

With some of the money my Grandparents sent me for Christmas, I bought Guardians of the Galaxy on Bluray. Now without ever seeing this movie before or reading any comics, I knew I was going to like Rocket Raccoon. It's a talking, gun toting, space raccoon, what's not to like?! After seeing the movie, I. LOVE. HIM! I pretty much want to hug him! Of course, I adore Groot! He's wonderful! But Rocket it my favorite. 

After taking my statistics test and getting a not so stellar score, I decided to call it a day on homework last night. I did check to see if I could do the next math assignment so at least that could get done on time. I can. But I learned something interesting. Apparently I am not the only person struggling with probability. It seems most of my class is and because of that our instructor has granted everyone another chance to retake the test to improve our scores and an extension. She also posted a power point that reviews the test. Personally, I think that's great! So, after I make a beef and veggie stew for dinner, I will go take care of that and then move on to this week's assignment. But somewhere either today or tomorrow, I have got to get my Context of Writing Paper started, edited, and finished. It's due this Sunday. 

Last night the under wire to one of my good bra's broke. I am really not happy about that. I've had this bra for two years now and loved it!

On to this morning. I got up later than I wanted to but I got dressed, ate, and had a cup of coffee. I'd decided last night instead of starting with homework first and then spending all day on it as I have pretty much the last several weeks, I would clean a little. So, I started with the part of the bathroom that I can clean, which is the mirror, vanity/sink, top half and inside of the toilet, and the outside of the shower doors. I also reorganized the little metal shelf we keep necessities wash cloths, and some books on. I have to do a lot of this sitting down, which doesn't really make it easier but it does help my back. When that was finished, I picked up the bedroom and while still in my desk chair, I tried vacuuming. I'm not supposed to sweep or vacuum with the way my back is. Of course, as usual, I woke up in pain, but I'm not sure I will be doing this all that often because I am hurting more than I was earlier. It was worth a shot. I  also reorganized my desk. 

Also this morning, I'd gotten a call from my cousin Shi-Chan only I was asleep so I had to call her back. Well along with the normal shitty crap she's dealing with in her life, she learned last week that one of our friends is in the hospital with a terminal illness. This friend of ours lives several states away so she can't make it out to see them and neither can I. Technically I'm not supposed to know yet because they don't want a lot of people to know. This person is trying to keep their troubles away from other people, which I understand so I'm not saying anything along the usual channels. Its awful! Really truly awful. I feel bad for them but also for Shi-Chan because she is closer to this friend of ours than I am and she just lost one of her Uncles and two years ago she lost her Dad. 

Just sad, stressful things happening all around. But hey, there's always Rocket Raccoon, the kitties, and the nap I am very tempted to take. 

Quick Kitty-shitty picture update

I don't know what is up with the camera on my phone and I haven't really had time to truly check out all the functions. But that's neither here nor there other than it takes some crappy pictures at the moment. 

I'm at my desk again today for this week's homework. My back hurts as always but today my neck has decided to join the party and my head makes three so I will be seeing out some medicine here in a few minutes. Narcisa has also joined me. She likes to curl up on my desk and watch me fuss over my homework. She also enjoys distracting me with her general cuteness but also with stealing various items, chewing on my notebook or planner, or other various objects, mainly my computer cord. Today she's decided to take a nap behind the laptop. Of course she's all tuckered out from her car ride to see where Amanda works and meet Amanda's boss and co-worker. She even spent a whole three minutes alone in the car while I deposited a Christmas check from my Grandparents in the bank. The ATM is outside at my bank so I kept an eye on her. She purred when I came back to the car. She rides pretty well too. She likes to curl up on the floor or on a seat. 

Grandma and Grandpa sent more than money for Christmas. Grandma embroidered some tea towels for me! They have animals and birds but the best part is that they smell like her house. I kind of want to curl up with them and pretend I am there. But I will have to do that later and I don't want to do that to too many of them else I will lose that nice smell. That and I am keeping them for when Amanda and I move out of her parent's house. 

Well, off to homework land I go. yuck!

It's an all pain, no bra, homework filled, want to go back to sleep, and kind of inspired kind of day.

Emmeline is my Steampunk Name and I adore it! Plus, Vampy cuteness!

My Steampunk name has nothing to do with today's post nor am I going to get into it further than, I adore that picture. I don't even remember what my search was when I found it else I would tell you but when I saw it, it was love at first sight and I knew I had save it! I'm going to seek out the artist soon and see what else she or he has done. 

Anyway, today isn't a total bust, but kind of close. My back is hurting something awful and it apparently wanted company because my neck, shoulders, and head have come to the party as well. I still have homework, but there are only two weeks left and then I get a break, thank the Gods! I do want to go back to sleep though which is why I am not moving everything over to the bed where I know I will be more comfortable. I am just too tried and the minute I am even the slightest bit comfortable, I'm out. 

The no bra bit. It's not out of comfort, in fact I am more uncomfortable without one on. I am leaving the bra off today because the strap from the one I was wearing yesterday and the day before (Shut up I don't have that many) rubbed me raw and between that and me not paying attention and scratching, I have a bit of chaffing. So, I am giving my skin a break and applying a triple antibiotic ointment to help it heal faster without infection, not that it would get infect but you never know. This isn't some common occurrence but my skin is very sensitive and it really doesn't take much for me have this problem.  

I am a little inspired. With all the homework and being in and out of the house the last month or so, we haven't really done a lot of cleaning. Our house isn't bad, but it's not dusted and there's some clutter out and about. A posted some pictures of her lovely "cave" and now I kind of want to do the same of our space but I won't until I get some cleaning done. We just have a bedroom and bathroom to ourselves, the rest of the apartment is shared between Amanda, myself, and her parents, although I tend to spend more time in my room than anywhere else. That will change when we get a place of our own. 

Well, I really do feel like I am about to fall asleep so I had better get to work on my homework. I have a big paper to write this week, some Yule stuff to plan and organize here at home, and Amanda needs some help with her blog tonight. 

Oh and did I mention that while we've been engaged for a few years, we've decided that we are going to finally set a date and get married? Well, we are. Of course since gay marriage is kind of joke in Idaho thank to our oh so accepting Governor Butch Otter and his continued campaign to get that right revoked, we are going to wait until we move to Washington state. I will let friends and family know as soon as we do but I will not be posting it here. As someone who was born and raised in Kansas and has personally seen Westboro Baptist Church in action, I don't want or need them picketing my wedding. Not that I would be a bridezilla, but I would hurt them. 

Still getting caught up, Roy Mustang, Keeping track of food makes you feel like a pig, at least it's tasty!

Roy Mustang from Fullmetal Alchemist because I neeeeeeed him, or rather to look at him. He is eye candy for my strained, tried, sandpapery eyes. That and he always cheers me up and after some things I saw tonight, I really need that. Don't worry, nothing tragic- unless you call seeing some bitch you used to know actually making a profit off of something she just decided to sit down and do one day. Something that you have been developing and putting in long hours of your life hone your skills and actually be good at. Ehm, no, I'm not bitter at all. But let me clarify why I am so bitter and the aforementioned reason is really just the poisoned icing of the matter.

If she and I were still friends, I wouldn't be angry over her success. I would be proud of her and cheering her on. But we aren't still friends and I don't think anyone who has done the kinds of horrible shit she's done to other people should get to live a happy life with everything she's ever wanted and still shit on the people she's hurt the most. Seeing her vanity/self published works get such great reviews over on amazon tonight was infuriating and hell. I know I shouldn't allow her to still get under my skin, but really after everything she did to Amanda's parents, the things she said about them that were so far from the truth it wasn't even funny, all the pain and suffering, and mess Amanda and I had to help clean up and are kind of being punished for even now. It is not fair. And I know life isn't fair but if life isn't fair then by the gods, I think that bitch should drown in her own vomit or choke on glass! 

Needless to say I was so pissed and upset I ate a cupcake and then one more snack than I was supposed to and then chased it with a bottle of water, as if that makes it better. I've started keeping track of my food intake and trying to limit how much I eat as well as changing how I eat in general so I can lose weight. I know things are stacked against my in a lot of respects but I believe I can do it and I have a wonderful friend helping me out and between her and Amanda supporting me and vice versa, I think we can all get to where we want to be. Of course, I haven't had the best two food days and looking back... yeah I need some work and to cut some of the convenience stuff out. It's just far too easy to put a pizza in the oven when your back is killing you and you're tired and still have a shit ton of homework to do.  

Slowly but surely I am finally getting caught up on my homework from that week of being sick and having such a hellish time in math. I've managed to complete two modules in Context of writing and only have one thing left to finish in the last module. I had a great tutoring appointment with the math people and have finally finished the horrible chapter I was having problems with and while I had to take the test three time, I got it! I do have to do two more modules and the test but once all of that is done, I can take a day or so to just breathe.  

We are having a little bit of trouble with our mail carrier. She seems to be too lazy to walk packages to our door and knock. In fact she was too lazy to bring a note about how she was holding 4 parcels and didn't know if I actually lived here, never mind that she has delivered packages and mail to me at this residence for the last three years. I am not the only one who has had trouble with this in town. Apparently there is a new law stating that all the parcels from the Veteran's Hospital need to be signed for. Of course I learned that while standing in line to get stamps and pick up my packages from an angry, disabled Veteran who didn't get his package of medication. He was not happy. Of course our particular mail carrier hadn't come back to the post office yet so we had to pick up my packages this morning, where I heard that yet another person was in for the same reason I was. Another carrier failed to leave a package like they were supposed too. Now I get that they are swamped and I sympathize. But that is no way to run a business. They need to hire more people on during the holidays, even temporary workers, because otherwise, if this shit keeps up, people are going to take their business elsewhere. One of my friends said she was bypassing USPS and going to ship a package to us through FedEx. I don't blame her. I am considering them as well to ship one to my parents.  Although, my parent's mail carrier is very good.

But anyway, I am going to bed for now. I didn't sleep very well last night and have been up since 8 am this morning.