Wednesday, May 18, 2016

Cue fantastical celebratory music and Narcisa is not too happy with me

Narcisa isn't happy with me. She doesn't like that I've stayed up two nights in a row and more or less sat glued to the sofa, occasionally getting up to move around for bathroom breaks and well, to move. It's not right that both her Mommies don't go to bed at the same time like normal. It's not right that one Mommy goes to bed while the other stays up working in front of her nemesis (a,k,a the computer) which steals all the attention from her when she wants it. It's not right that said working Mommy has taken two naps that only last for a couple of hours each, sleeps lighter, and won't let her eat her hair. No, none of this is right or natural. But even though Narcisa hasn't liked any of it, she's stayed with me most of the time, mostly napping on the ottoman and occasionally getting up for food and to chase her tail on the top level of her cat tree. 

Annoying the cat was worth it. Annoying Amanda with instrumental dark, Gothic music that helped set my mood, was also worth it. I finished the whole draft for my writing class. The assigned page limit was 20-25 and I ended up with 24 pages. I edited and smoothed out the first 6, taking into consideration the critiques of my fellow students and my instructor, and those Amanda made, and cranked out the rest over the last two days. I think my general page turn out for the project was 12 pages a day, which is great and 2 more than it was previously, and that's even with having to take a couple breaks for a couple of hours. Yes, I am shamelessly bragging about it because I fucking did it!

I needed this assignment. It reminded me that I don't completely suck. It reminded me how much I love writing, the fun in the challenge to fix glaring issues, and try different words and new things structurally. Most importantly, it felt right and like this was exactly where I was supposed to be. I had a couple of moments where I thought some things I had written sucked, but that weren't actually bad. I had some insecure moments, but by the end I realized somethings. I can do this, I don't suck nearly as bad as I think I do, and that it's a really bad idea to piss Zofie, the main character of the story, off. She's a bit vicious.  Oh and while I made it work into the parameters of a short story, this really is a novel, a novella in the least. 

So now that it is done and submitted I get to start the load of homework for this week. I am probably going to spend some time watching a bit of anime first, just to give myself a little bit of a break. Oddly enough, I want either a steak with veggies for dinner or a Bacon and tomato sandwich. 

Oh before I forget, I adulted yesterday afternoon. I called that holistic doctor's office. They are taking new patients with my insurance and I have an appointment next Thursday. I am actually excited and looking forward to meeting and seeing a doctor. Now, I just need to adult either today or tomorrow to get myself into a gynecologist for this PCOS issue.     

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